DR. WALLACE: My first boyfriend and I broke up over three years ago, when his family moved away from our state. Since then, I have dated quite a few guys, and it's been real fun to hang out with them and get to know their various personalities and styles.

I haven't seen my ex-boyfriend in several years, but when I do think of him once in a while, I always think he and I were the perfect couple when we were dating back then.

Believe it or not, I've heard from some family friends that he's back in our town again! I don't yet know the circumstance surrounding his return, but I'm sure I'll find out the details very soon. Do you think we have a chance to rekindle our romance, or is it more likely that one or both of us has moved on mentally, since nearly three years have gone by?

I'm anxious to see him, but I'm also worried that he'll tell me he's no longer interested in dating me. — Hopeful to Reunite, via email

HOPEFUL TO REUNITE: It's been a long time since you've seen your ex, but in matters of the heart, truly anything is possible. I wouldn't get your hopes up, since he could have any number of new situations in play now that would preclude dating you again. So, take a cautious yet friendly approach, and steel yourself to not have any expectations at your first face-to-face meeting with him.

You'll learn a lot in the first half-hour of speaking with him, so take things nice and easy. It might be that he has moved on to a new relationship by now. If, by chance, he's interested in spending time with you again, please remember that you are both different people now. Go slowly, and limit your expectations. An old fable states that absence makes the heart grow fonder, but that is not always the case. In a few select instances, it can be true. Time will tell if your situation plays out that way. Good luck, and at the very least, you should have an outstanding friend for life either way.

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS

DR. WALLACE: It hasn't even been a week, and I've already broken my New Year's resolution! Yikes! I really wanted to accomplish the goal of exercising every single day in this new year of 2021, and I'm sorry to inform you that I didn't even make it one full week.

Why are New Year's resolutions so hard to keep, and what should I do from here? — Came Up Short, via email

CAME UP SHORT: Well, I feel that your resolution was unrealistic for you to keep, but I commend you for setting a goal and going after it. It's also a good sign that you are disappointed that you won't achieve that very lofty goal! An exercise streak of 365 consecutive days is tough for anyone to achieve, even a professional athlete. We human beings get tired, busy, sick and physically and/or mentally exhausted once in a while.

Now, rather than quitting your exercise plans entirely, I heartily suggest that you simply modify them. Set a new, more realistic goal of exercising five or six days each week. See how you feel as each week goes by, and plan for a day off within each week to recharge your batteries. And if you miss another day here or there, that's not a big deal, as long as you are completing a nice, long string of good weeks in terms of exercise.

To answer your question, I've seen studies over the years regarding January resolutions, and the results show that most Americans have a problem keeping resolutions due to a lack of follow-through. In my opinion, many people set their goals and expectations too high, and then they throw in the towel once they don't keep up with their original plan. It's more important to make incremental progress throughout a new year than to get too high or too low mentally when comparing actual results with your initial expectations.

In your case, I'd say you have an excellent chance of developing and maintaining a yearlong exercise plan. Don't be too hard on yourself by striving for perfection. Instead, seek to build upon your success level gradually over time. If you can exercise even the majority of the days in each week over the course of a year, that will be at least 208 workouts! That's a number to be proud of, and you may well exceed 208, if you stick with it!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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