Marissa is 33 years old. She says she's had her heart stomped on a couple of times but she's always been strong and moved on. "I was content to remain single and focus on my daughter and myself," she says. And then she ran into Bill.
He was an old friend from high school. They exchanged phone numbers and started texting. They were both going to their high school reunion, so they decided to go together.
She says: "We hit it off right away. The night went so smoothly, I invited him to a friend's gathering the following weekend. That went smoothly as well. Finally he asked me on our first date. It was the best time I've ever had. I felt like a kid all over again. We were like children, too shy to hold hands, just sneaking looks at each other. After that night we were inseparable."
Although they'd just been dating for a few weeks, Maria says it felt like years: "We said, 'I love you' even though we knew it was way too soon. But when it's really love, you just know it. All our friends commented on how lucky we were to have found each other. They said that we were the perfect couple, that we were meant for one another."
Neither Marissa nor Bill was new at love. He had two children from two different women. Marissa had her daughter. She told him about the men who'd been in her life; he told her about the women in his.
"We accepted each other. Everything was perfect, a dream come true."
And then Bill started acting just a bit differently, the kind of thing that's hard to put your finger on at first. He seemed to be spending less time with Marissa; he didn't seem to talk to her in quite the same way.
"Turns out the younger child's mother had a bit of a problem with our relationship. He asked me for some time to straighten things out. I gave it to him, but the time stretched out and he wound up breaking up with me. It's almost a year later, but it's hard for me to get over him.
"His friends tell me he misses me. I've gotten those late night drunken calls from him, telling me he still loves me and how much he misses me. Then we pretend not to care and say cruel things to each other, things we don't really mean. But something inside me tells me it's true — he does miss me and love me.
"I'm the type of person who usually lets go easily and moves on. I always figured if I was able to get over my daughter's father whom I was in love with for eight years, then I should be able to get over anyone. But with Bill, it's been so hard. Our relationship only lasted four months, but it seemed like four years. It was too good to be true."
(Hi, Marissa. It's me, Cheryl, with a sharp pin to burst your big, fat bubble. Bill doesn't love you. If he loved you, he'd be with you. He's a low-life scum, and you're lucky you're not baby mama No. 3. The next time he drunk-dials you, hang up!)
Have you been in Tales? Send your update, along with your questions, problems and rants to [email protected]. And check out my e-books, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front" and "I'll Call You. Not."
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