One of the most valuable things about drag queens is the "drag names" they make up for themselves.

You know what I mean. Names like Ivanna Mann or Tess Tosterone. It's an undermined source of American humor reaching all the way back to boxing nicknames like "The Manassa Mauler" and old-school stripper nicknames like "Busty" Russell.

Such nicknames are an art of the people, forged in grimy dressing rooms, fluorescent-lit newsrooms, and barrooms where the cigar-chewing owner was likely to be nicknamed "Chick" or "Whitey."

You have to work hard at nicknames like that, and there's no guarantee they'll stick.

Singing drag queen Flamy Grant, whose album "Bible Belt Baby" reached No. 1 on the iTunes Christian Album Charts, has one that's gonna stick.

The name is, of course, homage to non-drag queen Christian music icon Amy Grant.

Flamy, who looks like a burly, overripe Dolly Parton, sings about acceptance and lack of stigma and a bunch of other stuff that sickens Christians of the "Heil, Christ" variety.

As for me, I believe what the sisters of The Holy Union of The Sacred Heart taught me in grade school. They said we are all the children of God, and I stopped right there, and held on.

The thing is, I got an idea.

A gospel-singing drag queen? Sitcom gold!

A little bit of "That Girl," a dash of "The Beverly Hillbillies," just a splash of "The Nanny" and we have "The Coach and The Queen."

Premise? Here's the pitch.

In a merry mix-up, a church in small town, red-state America invites Flamy Grant to perform at revival, thinking that she is actually Amy Grant.

Hilarity ensues.

But not for local high school football coach Wayne Armstrong, who takes one look at Flamy and feels the kind of feelings he hasn't felt since his wife died in a cotton gin explosion.

Coach Armstrong doesn't know that Flamy is a little more starting tackle than she is soccer mom, but after a couple of peach wine coolers and a magical night under the magnolias, Coach Armstrong is head-over-cleats for the gospel songbird.

Soon, they marry. The coach starts asking quarterback Bubba for his pronouns, and Flamy learns to bake zucchini bread

In Episode 6, "Cheerleaders Gone Wild," Flamy gets a huge laugh when she tells the coach, "If you think the cheerleaders look trampy NOW, wait till I give them a makeover."

Mean old Preacher Jones is against Flamy and calls her mean names. The school board meets to consider firing Coach Armstrong, and Flamy makes an impassioned speech about tolerance.

Best of all, with quarterback Bubba finally out of the closet and accepted by his teammates, the team begins to win, battling their way to the state finals.

As the boys drive in the final touchdown, Flamy runs onto the field and hugs a triumphant Coach Armstrong.

"I always wanted to try this in a small town," she whispers.

To find out more about Marc Munroe Dion, and read features by Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com. Dion's latest book, a collection of his best columns, is called "Devil's Elbow: Dancing in the Ashes of America." It is available in paperback from Amazon.com, and for Nook, Kindle, and iBooks.

Photo credit: Akira Hojo at Unsplash