He's Perfect ... Except He's perfect in every way, except he calls his pet "my itty-bitty kitty." She's the love of your life, but does every movie she drags you to have to be subtitled? Here are some of the little things that drive you cray cray ... "My husband wears …Read more. Having Her Man-Cake and Wanting to Eat it Too Three years ago she met Andy while picking up her boots at the shoemaker. They were married six weeks later. And as much as she likes being married, she misses the chase. She still tosses out lines to meet men, but she doesn't follow through. Or …Read more. Be strong! Dear Cheryl: My ex and I dated for a year before he ended our relationship two months ago. Since then, we've seen each other twice, both times to keep plans we had. In that time, I've moved back home to help my parents. Since I've moved, we've …Read more. All's Well That Ends With Three Sons It was Friday night, and Callie and her girlfriend were at the mall buying jeans. Two really cute guys approached and said, "Wanna grab a pizza?" Derrick paired off with Callie and off they went. She was 18; he was 19. They started to date. Callie …Read more.more articles
Two Turkeys at This Thanksgiving
Nobody should be alone on Thanksgiving. Everyone should be sitting at some dining room table, passing stuffing, eating turkey, asking for seconds. At least that's the way Cam felt about the holiday. So, when he met Ginger, an absolute stunner, a total knockout with nowhere to go, he decided to bring her home.
He had met her only a week before, at a party. As they talked, he discovered that she had no family in the area. She said she'd love to spend the holiday with Cam and his family. She arrived there with a dozen roses for his mother.
"Ginger fit right in," Cam says. "She came in, headed for the kitchen and was suddenly side by side with my mom, helping. Mom, of course, thought the world of her."
The large crowd finally sat down to eat.
Cam has five sisters. One of them had brought Steve, whom she was interested in. Cam was sitting between Ginger, his date, and Steve, his sister's date. Early on in the meal, Ginger, who's a hair dresser, and Steve struck up a conversation. A good one. So good that they strained their necks to talk over, behind and around Cam.
"I almost felt an impulse to lean back so they could talk across me," Cam says. "At a certain point they were trying to maneuver their faces around my head so they could see each other."
After the meal, the trio — that's Cam, Ginger and Steve — adjourned to the TV room for a football game. This time, Ginger landed in the middle of the couch. Cam on one side, Steve on the other.
"Picture this," Cam says. "She is in the middle of the couch leaning to her right. He is to her right with one hand right next to her leg — this close — and his leg was crossed and by twisting, he was directly over her. He was pretty darn close, as a matter of fact, a lot closer to her than I was."
Still Cam held his tongue.
"It was borderline — enough to send off alarms all over the house, but not so much that I could comfortably say, 'Uh, Steve, you mind peeling yourself off my date?'"
Finally it was time for Steve to leave. Cam was relieved, obviously. Until Ginger called to Steve from across the house, "Oh, Steve, did you want my number for that hair cut?" Right.
Steve came bounding back and sent Cam in search of a pen. Great, Cam was thinking, here I am helping them hook up. Ginger gave Steve her telephone number in front of Cam, his mother and the sister who had brought Steve. When Cam dropped Ginger at her place that night, she said something about getting together again. Cam just muttered. That night, a relative called him on the phone.
"Uh, Cam," she said. "I don't know if you noticed, but I think you've got a problem with your date; I hope you weren't planning on a long-term thing with her."
Cam said no. And just to make sure he wouldn't give in to any small, overriding impulse to call her again — she was, after all, a total beauty — he ripped up her telephone number into little tiny pieces and threw them away. Just so much garbage. Like the turkey carcass.
Were you ever humiliated in front of your family? Send your tale, along with your questions, problems and rants to firstname.lastname@example.org. And check out my new ebook, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front."
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