Recently
Be Well
This will be my last column as Dear Margo. I have been giving advice for 15 years — first as Dear Prudence and then under my own name. I have been writing for newspapers for 45 years. The time feels right to retire from deadline journalism. I …Read more.
When Things Don't Look Quite Right
Dear Margo: I'm 60, and my boyfriend is a few years younger. He recently moved in with me. His job requires him to meet with people after their workday. I know he really is doing this on some nights, because I have seen people enter his workplace. …Read more.
Play It as It Lays
Dear Margo: My boyfriend (of more than three and a half years) and I are at a crossroads in our lives. We're both in a master's program, and up until now we've been very serious and committed to our relationship. However, last week he brought up …Read more.
Unwarranted Guilt
Dear Margo: I am married with two almost-teenagers. We aren't rich, but we're comfortable. I have a cousin who has two children. One is near my children's age. This one has spent summers with us for years, and we have taken him on almost every …Read more.
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Turning the Other Cheek -- in SpadesDear Margo: My husband is very reticent about emotion other than affection. He's a very nice husband. I'm concerned, however, that he may be depressed. What's immediately troubling is that when someone treats him badly, he swings around and tries to understand their point of view. This has happened more than once, but the most recent example is that we were blindsided by the foreclosure on our apartment building. We found out on the last day of the month — and by that time the landlord had left town with the next month's rents and all of our deposits. It amounted to about $6,000 from us, and who knows how much from his other tenants? We can't recover our money — the guy is in bankruptcy. My husband keeps excusing the man. I, too, can see how it probably happened. The guy fooled himself about his finances, had an extravagant wife and lied to everyone in hopes that he could somehow pull the chestnuts out of the fire. But I'm still very angry and feel violated. (We were fairly friendly with him and his wife.) My husband says he was a fool for not checking up on the guy, but he didn't mean to hurt anyone, and he just couldn't say no to his wife. I say that lots of forgers, check kiters, embezzlers and so on operate out of desperation, but that doesn't justify their behavior. My husband says we should be nice to the couple if they show up again. I want nothing to do with them and wouldn't let them in the door. I also doubt they would ever come back. Is this a sign of depression? It doesn't feel normal to me. — Don't Know What To Think Dear Don't: I suggest you go online and look up the symptoms of depression.
A Suggestion Dear Margo: This is in response to the woman who doesn't cook but wanted to invite several couples over for dinner. I suggest ordering whatever food you want to serve. If someone compliments you (which is only polite), laugh and say, "Thanks, I made it myself. The hardest part was opening the packaging in the (insert brand here) containers." This works whether you are ordering from your favorite pizza joint or a gourmet take-away restaurant. People will laugh, and everyone can get down to the business of enjoying themselves while enjoying dinner together. — Helena Dear Hel: Thank you for this. I love humor as a way to deal with all kinds of things. Your suggestion reminds me of many years ago when my mother asked a renowned hostess for the recipe for the stuffed cabbage she served. The woman demurred and said, "Oh, it's an old family recipe, and I don't give it out." A few weeks later, the hostess wrote again, probably prodded by a guilty conscience, and said, "Regarding the stuffed cabbage, the family is Stouffer's." — Margo, entertainingly Dear Margo is written by Margo Howard, Ann Landers' daughter. All letters must be sent via the online form at www.creators.com/dearmargo. Due to a high volume of e-mail, not all letters will be answered. COPYRIGHT 2013 MARGO HOWARD DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM 
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