Cheating Wife?

By Susan Deitz

July 27, 2016 3 min read

DEAR SUSAN: Can you confirm the following as signs of a cheating wife? Not appreciative of quality sexual intercourse with husband; interested in sex-oriented movies that praise the male lead's performance; repeatedly praising the husband of another couple; repeatedly mentioning another man's attention to her; finding ways to point out something related to another man; praising the financial power of another man; refusing to go out with her husband; and not interested in talking about personal intimacy issues with her husband.

Thanks, Susan, for your feedback!

DEAR READER: I cannot — and will not — go on record accusing your mate of infidelity. Only a sleuth, a private detective, on the case 24 hours a day, can unequivocally make that call. But what I can (and will) say is: Your wife isn't a happy bird. She's showing signs of sexual frustration, which, if left untended, could wreck your marriage. Clearly, she's not satisfied with being your wife, but the reasons are murky at this time. Did you guys know each other well before taking the plunge? How was your premarital intimacy? Did you talk intimately to each other, trusting you'd be understood? Did your wife live up to your sexual expectations? (And did you live up to hers? Ahem.) Clearly, you two need a kindly third party to hear you out. But take notice: Even mental cheating is a red-hot danger sign.

DEAR READERS: This being the hottest of summers, I encourage a cooling-off period for your active brain. Not to allow it to stultify, certainly not. Just to give it pause and put it into summer relaxation mode. Ready to be titillated?

—Does love always lead to marriage? Should it?

—Does living with someone increase/decrease desire? Explain.

—What do you look for in a partner?

—Would you — could you — fall in love with someone from another country? Why or why not?

—Has your picture of an ideal partner changed since you've become older/single again? Explain. And expand.

Have a question for Susan? You can reach her directly at

Photo credit: Ian T. McFarland

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