Disturbing Social Media Posts Dear Annie: A couple of months ago, I met a guy at a concert and he added me as his friend on Facebook. Except for that one encounter, I don't really know him. Tonight, I was strolling through Facebook and noticed a very disturbing post he had made. …Read more. Mad as Hell and Not Gonna Take It Anymore! Dear Annie: I have been married for 50 years and don't think I can stand one more day. The man I am married to was once everything to me. Now, as each day passes, I grow more resentful. I like him less and less, almost to the point of hatred. He has …Read more. Open Marriage, Closed Hearts Dear Annie: I am six months into a separation from my husband of seven years. (The separation was his idea.) I thought our relationship was solid and was completely blindsided when he told me he felt deserted and lonely. While I am still hoping for …Read more. Enabling Daughter Needs Help Dear Annie: My friend, "Andrea," is in her early 20s and concerned about her mother, "Joan." Joan has been diagnosed with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, and she has abused prescription and other drugs for as long as Andrea can remember. A few …Read more.more articles
When Love Throws a Wrench Into Friendship
Dear Annie: My husband, "Rick," had been close friends with "Edward" for 30 years. We used to get together frequently, and Edward was always kind and considerate and someone we highly respected. Then, Edward got engaged to "Michelle."
I was pregnant at the time, and my doctor put me on bed rest because I had already been hospitalized once. I could not travel out of state for any of the festivities. However, Rick was gone nearly every weekend attending the engagement party, bachelor party and wedding. He said Edward was not acting like himself during these visits, saying he was uncharacteristically inconsiderate and strange.
Two months later, I gave birth to a girl, and we invited Edward and Michelle to the baptism. Edward called to say they would not be attending because Michelle was hurt that I didn't come to the wedding. She said my absence meant I did not support their marriage, and they needed time to "heal" from this insult. Michelle also was offended that Rick's wedding speech did not make enough mention of her.
Rick and I were livid. Not only did my doctor forbid me from traveling to the wedding, but Rick spent a long time composing a thoughtful, funny and heartfelt speech and even delivered some of it in Michelle's native language. Rick angrily confronted Edward and disinvited them to the baptism. Edward then claimed it was a miscommunication. When Edward and Michelle announced that they were pregnant, we sent a thoughtful baby gift, which Edward and Michelle did not acknowledge.
Rick is determined to rebuild the friendship. He calls Edward at least once a month, but the calls are often unanswered and unreturned. It's been a year since "the phone call," and I'm still furious, but Rick is grieving. Edward does not deserve my husband's loyalty and forgiveness, but for Rick's sake, I want them to reconcile.
Dear Scorned: We are so sorry that Edward's marriage has thrown a wrench into his relationship with Rick, but these things happen. The only one who can fix it is Edward. Be supportive of Rick by sympathizing without being negative about Edward or Michelle. Encourage new friendships by introducing yourselves to other couples with young children. The best thing you can do for your husband is to help him move forward one day at a time.
Dear Annie: I am a skilled professional and have been unemployed for a year. I have applied for many positions via online postings that are often anonymous. After sending my resume and cover letter, I am frustrated that I never hear back. I have no idea whether they received my information or read it, and there is no way to follow up, as I have no idea who they are. I know they probably get a lot of applications, but a short courtesy note would be nice, even if it's "thanks but no thanks." — Oregon
Dear Oregon: We completely agree. Unfortunately, because these sites do not have a contact person, no one feels a personal obligation to respond. Even an automated response saying your resume was received would be a step in the right direction.
Dear Annie: "Sibling Support" said her mother is always asking for money for the younger siblings, but spends it on herself. The next time she has occasion to talk to her mother, she should open the conversation by saying, "Mom, I'm a little short this week. Could you possibly lend me a few dollars?" I guarantee this will nip those requests for help in the bud without having to refuse her outright. "Sibling Support" can then buy treats for the younger siblings directly, leaving Mom out of the loop. — St. Maarten, Dutch Caribbean
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