DR. WALLACE: A friend and I were discussing a subject that involved current events in our culture, and it was obvious within the first few minutes that even though we are very good friends, we see this particular issue very much from opposite points of view.

I'm pretty set in my belief system, and our entire family is proud of who we are and how we look at the world, therefore we're not known to hold back our feelings or opinions. However, both my parents have taken a lot of time to speak to me and my siblings about how to do this in a reasonable, earnest and tasteful way.

So when this subject came up, and I explained my viewpoint, my friend kept telling me not to try to change her opinion on the matter! I immediately told her that I was absolutely not trying to change her opinion, I was simply stating the way I see the issue from my point of view. The more we talked about it, the more frustrated she became, even though I stayed calm and did my best to simply say that we're both entitled to our opinions and viewpoints.

Eventually, we talked about something else, but I often feel when I see her now that she has not forgotten about this issue entirely. In the future, is there anything I can do to smooth out situations like this better? — We Disagree on One Thing, via email

WE DISAGREE ON ONE THING: Disagreeing on certain things is always part of life in virtually every society around the globe. Patience, tact and a calm, respectful tone of voice are always the best tools to use when making one's point or to receive information from someone else with an opposite viewpoint.

In the future with this particular friend, don't plan to have to give ground or apologize for having an opposite point of view. Instead, focus on the things the two of you have in common and the things you enjoy the most together. The fact that you are friends obviously means there are common areas that are significant between the two of you. Seek to focus on those and sidestep unnecessarily bringing up topics that may be difficult for the two of you to discuss. But if and when they do arise, you can simply mention that you've discussed these before and that you both respectfully disagree on some of the issues, even though you're both good friends with each other.

MY LITTLE BROTHER DOES NOT USE ALL HIS CLOSET SPACE

DR. WALLACE: I'm the second youngest of four siblings. My two older sisters each have their own rooms, but I'm the third girl and have to share a room with my little brother. I'm 13 and he's 9. We have to share one closet, and he hardly has any clothes at all, but since I'm a girl, I tend to have more clothes now that I'm a teenager.

In the past, he would pile a bunch of his toys and accessories on his side of the closet, but now I need more space. I asked him politely if I could use some extra part of our closet, but he won't let me do it. All my stuff is so crowded that I have to put some of my things in drawers, and they get all wrinkled up.

I asked my father about this, and he just told me that we each get to use half the closet, and that's it. But my brother barely has any clothes on his side. Instead, he has a whole lot of toys, games and accessories that he hardly ever uses anyhow. How can I get my little brother to be reasonable and let me use more closet space? — Girls Need Closet Space, via email

GIRLS NEED CLOSET SPACE: Negotiating with a 9-year-old might indeed be difficult, but that's exactly what I recommend you try to do. Start by thinking about your little brother, what he likes and what you could do that would make him happy. Are there chores that he doesn't like doing? Maybe you could do a few of his chores in exchange for an extra portion of closet space?

You could also approach your parents and tell them you'd be willing to help clean out your family's garage and organize it better so that some of your brother's accessories that he rarely uses could be stored in the garage instead of in the closet in your room.

Finally, you mentioned you have two older sisters. You could politely ask one or both of them if you could store a few items in their closets, and similarly try to do a favor or two for them in exchange. At 13, you're just entering your teen years, but these years are all about negotiations, compromise and not necessarily getting everything you want when you want it. Do your best to use your mind and interpersonal skills to negotiate with your siblings and perhaps even your parents to try to make a compromise that could help satisfy everyone. And no matter what, keep your cool at all times along the way. Smile a lot, and thank everybody for considering helping you. You'll have a much better chance of success if you approach this amiably rather than in a condescending or complaining manner.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Volodymyr Hryshchenko at Unsplash