DR. WALLACE: My best friend and l are 17, and we have been friends for five years.

Over the years, we have often told each other that we feel like sisters since we see the world very much the same way and have had experienced a lot together. We've always gotten along really well!

But last week, we discussed a topic we've never really talked about before, and I was shocked to discover that I completely disagreed with her position!

Now, this topic is not the most important thing we deal with on a day-to-day basis, fortunately, but it still bothers me that we think so differently about it. I've been thinking about this issue nonstop for the last several days. I now fear that I won't ever be able to look at my friend the same way again. I also worry that we may not end up being as close of friends going forward as we have been these past five years. Is there anything I can do about this, or do you have any advice that might help? — Beyond Deeply Surprised, via email

BEYOND DEEPLY SURPRISED: My advice would be to focus on your long-standing friendship and how much you two have in common, versus worrying about one area that you disagree about. Disagreements amongst any two individuals are inevitable, and it's far wiser to celebrate your commonalities than it is to focus on a single area of disagreement — one that you stated is not a core part of your life.

Even identical twins don't see eye to eye on everything throughout their lifetimes even though they have identical DNA. Do your best to get over your shock and resume your friendship as if the area of disagreement was never discussed. Simply don't bring it up again and don't focus on it unless for some reason it becomes a much larger issue in your life. For now, you've indicated that is not the case.

WE INTEND TO BE VERY SERIOUS ABOUT RESOLUTIONS!

DR. WALLACE: Some friends of mine at my high school and I are already starting to think about making New Year's resolutions and then sharing them with everyone in the group so that we'll feel more obligated and motivated to follow through on our plans.

I'm considering several ideas that I have, but they vary widely in terms of degree of difficulty both to get started on and to maintain going forward.

I do have a couple of easier ideas that I'm considering mentioning to the group since I wouldn't face as much scrutiny or potential shame for not following through, as opposed to selecting one of the harder ideas. What do you think about this? Would it be better to stretch myself and try something pretty hard or take it easy and go after some low-hanging fruit? — I'm in a New Year's Resolution Group, via email

I'M IN A NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION GROUP: My recommendation is to try both! It's a great idea to try to develop a difficult resolution for the new year, one that you may truly benefit from if you're able to make progress and stick with it for the most part. But at the same time if you had a relatively easy secondary resolution idea, you'd feel obligated to follow through and at least achieve the easier one.

And since you came up with such a good question here and what I feel is a good idea, why don't you take your dual resolution idea to your group? Perhaps each member of the group could come up with one more difficult and one easier resolution and you would all enjoy discussing the contrast in the new year. I wish every member of your group success in achieving all of your resolutions!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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