DR. WALLACE: I am now 21 and have had this problem for eight years. When I was 13 years old, I would occasionally go into my room and fantasize about being a singer or about being popular. By the time I was a junior in high school, my fantasizing became consistent. I fantasized so much that I slightly lost touch with the real world. I became withdrawn and was walking around as if in a daze. All through college, my instructors noticed that my mind seemed to always be on something else. Well, now that I have successfully graduated from college, I'm still fantasizing.

I have decided that I can't and don't want to go on living my life in a fantasy world. The problem is that I have fantasized so much that my mind has become accustomed to it.

Do you have any idea how I can stop living in this fantasy world? I have had many unsuccessful attempts at solving the problem myself. — Anonymous, Baltimore

ANONYMOUS: Since you have successfully graduated from college, not all your time was spent in your "dream world."

The most important factor in avoiding the fantasy world is to stay active, both physically and mentally, in the real world.

Spending more time interacting with friends and family would be a good start, especially if you can get yourself to proactively set up interactions, meetings, outings and events that work for everyone's schedule.

Since you have had many unsuccessful attempts at solving the problem by yourself, it's time you also had a chat with a professional therapist. Be open, honest and ready to learn some new skills, and I trust you'll find solid footing in the real world quite soon.

THESE ARE WARNING SIGNS

DR. WALLACE: I'm 17 and have been dating a guy I recently met who is 18. I'll be a senior in high school and will graduate in June 2020. I'm a good student and achieve good grades. I have been accepted to The University of Texas at El Paso, but I'm not sure if I want to go to college now. It all depends on my relationship with my new guy. He dropped out of school during his junior year because he had a chance to work in an auto repair shop with his friend whose dad owns the repair shop. He makes good wages, and he really likes his job.

My parents disapprove of him because I happened to mention one day when he was late that he probably stopped off for a beer with his friend before picking me up for a date. Indeed, he did have a few beers with his friend after work that day. He does this almost every day after work, but I have never seen him drunk. My parents seemed to like him before, but now they want me to stop seeing him entirely. They are also worried about me riding in his car because they think he is prone to drinking and driving. He is a safe driver, even after a few beers. I should know; I have seen him drive quite well after a few beers.

How can I convince my parents that drinking a few beers is no big deal and my new boyfriend is a good guy? — His Girl, El Paso, Texas

HIS GIRL: Your young friend has a serious drinking problem. If he doesn't change his drinking habits, chances are good that his alcohol intake will increase over time. As it is now, it's not the amount of beer he consumes daily, it's the fact that he drinks nearly every day. Even one alcoholic drink can affect a driver's ability to drive safely. Besides, he's breaking the law as an underage drinker.

The University of Texas at El Paso is an excellent university, and since you have been accepted, I suggest you plan on furthering your education there. Enroll there, show up for your classes, and don't look back.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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