DR. WALLACE: My boyfriend and I have been together for two years and we previously discussed getting married in 2025, or about two years from now.

Everything has been going well for us for a long time, but recently he has started pressing me to become physical with him. We agreed back when we first started dating that we would refrain from physical activity until we were married — if we ever decided to make that commitment together.

Well, I love him and we seemingly have been on track for a happy marriage in the future. But now he's pushing me to change that decision. He says that we already know each other so well and that it won't impact our future plans in the least.

I remain uncomfortable about this and don't want to start a rift between us, but I don't want to change my mind on this issue either. It's an issue that speaks to my character and personal integrity.

But I now feel stuck and in a tough spot given his change of heart recently. Should I hold my ground or seek some sort of compromise with him? — We Made a Plan, via email

WE MADE A PLAN: Yes, you should stick to your previous decision and also remind him that the two of you made a decision together. He is out of line to now be pressuring you after agreeing to a plan and sticking to that plan thus far.

You mentioned the word "compromise," and I would encourage you to tread carefully in that area. The only compromise I see that could work for the two of you would be to move up the date of your wedding.

However, there was likely a good reason the two of you selected the year of 2025, maybe due to your personal educational and/or work and career situations. So, think carefully about this backdrop and also carefully about how you feel about him overall given this recent development.

Then if it makes sense to move up your date of marriage, you can consider that if you wish to. But if you feel moving up the wedding date would compromise other issues in your life, I would encourage you to continue to "hold your ground" as you put it.

I THINK MY MOM SHOULD VACATE DURING MY PARTY

DR. WALLACE: My mom is allowing me to have a birthday party two Saturdays from now at our house. She's a great mom and helps me in many ways, but at times she can be overly protective.

I'm planning to celebrate my 17th birthday with about 10 to 12 of my best friends, so there will be both boys and girls in attendance. We plan for the party to start at 8 p.m. and go until midnight.

My mom has a good friend only five houses down the street, and I think she should spend those four hours there with her friend. However, my mom told me that she does not want to turn her home over to a dozen unsupervised teenagers alone.

This fits my mom's overprotective nature, but I feel it's crazy for her to be there. What can I do about this? — I Prefer a Private Party, via email

I PREFER A PRIVATE PARTY: When you're 18 and have your own place, you can have all of the private parties that you wish to host. But for now, you're 17 and living in your mother's home, so you must abide by her rules.

And for the record, I agree with your mother's decision. If something were to happen in your unsupervised home, there could be potential liability of some sort. And beyond that, it's her home and she has every right to be there and keep at least a modest eye on things.

Perhaps she can agree to help you a bit in the kitchen and otherwise keep a low profile during the party. This would be a worthy compromise for you to pursue.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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