DR. WALLACE: A boy that I had dated several times was killed in an auto accident. It's difficult to believe that I will never see him again. His funeral was two months ago. I went, and it was the saddest thing I have ever experienced. This fellow was a good friend and I cared about him very much. The last time I talked with him, he told me that we would have a lot of great times together in the future. I also feel for his mother and father and his sister.

Please tell me how long I will feel this depression. It's starting to affect my relationship with my co-workers as well as my family. I'm 19 and even though I work full-time, I live with my parents and a younger sister. — Nameless, Des Moines, Iowa.

NAMELESS: You will always remember the tragic loss of a family member, a loved one, or a good friend, but Time, the universal healer of all wounds both physical and emotional, will allow you to cope. In time, your depression should end and wonderful thoughts of your friend will replace your blues.

If your depression grows stronger, or you feel that you are incapable of coping by yourself, it would be wise to seek professional counseling.

I ACCEPTED HER APOLOGY

DR. WALLACE: A girl and I have been close friends for several years. We are both in the seventh grade. Last week in the cafeteria I accidently bumped her arm when she was drinking a glass of chocolate milk and it spilled all over her clothes. I felt terrible and apologized immediately. I tried to help her clean up the mess, but she was really mad and said, "Get out of my sight, you clumsy ox!" All of our other friends saw it happen and started laughing. I'm a bit overweight, so I was terribly embarrassed.

This girl called me the next night and apologized, saying that she was upset and said things that she regretted. I accepted her apology.

Now my mom says that my friend's comment was unforgivable and that I made a mistake in accepting the apology. Do you agree? — Confused, Davenport, Iowa.

CONFUSED: Your friend's comments were rude and crude, but when she apologized, they were forgivable. Put what happened behind you and renew your friendship with her with vigor and good nature!

GIRLS FEAR BEING ALONE

DR. WALLACE: When it comes to being afraid, why are guys braver than girls? I'll admit that I'm a "fraidy cat," but my boyfriend is one brave dude, most of the time. — Nameless, Gary, Ind.

NAMELESS: Guys and girls experience fear equally. It's just that things that tend to cause fear in guys and girls often differ.

A study of ninth-graders showed that both sexes shared fears of darkness and strangers. Girls were more likely to be afraid of insects, injury and being alone. Guys scored higher in being afraid of heights and unknown animals.

Another way we differ? Girls tend to handle their fears by looking to others for support. Guys are more inclined to confront their fears in an effort to overcome them. It's a strategy worth copying. Research shows that facing up to your fears can bring about some serious feelings of strength and triumph!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.