DR. WALLACE: My younger brother has always been somewhat outgoing and certainly very friendly to everyone he meets. He's three years younger than I am, and he's really a good guy, but sometimes the way that he acts and the things that he says truly make me cringe.

For example, whenever he's in a room with various people, or even if we're out somewhere and we're talking to a group of people, he will always make it a point to go out of his way to acknowledge everyone and make sure that everyone knows everyone else's name. And there are sometimes when he'll even say the person's unusual spelling of their name out loud! I totally cringe when this happens because when we're just having an open discussion among a group of people, nobody cares how somebody spells their name at that moment. But for whatever reason, he feels the need, obligation or desire to point all of this out to everyone. I know he's coming at this from a sincere point of view, but it's definitely too much some of the time, and I notice others will also sometimes wince when this happens.

The other thing I should mention is that this particular brother doesn't take criticism well, and if anything is said in a corrective, suggestive or negative way, he will pout and shut down, sometimes almost reflexively.

Given all this as a backdrop, what do you recommend I do to actually help my brother be less socially awkward in the manner that he definitely is? — Brother Is Over the Top a Lot, via email

BROTHER IS OVER THE TOP A LOT: It indeed sounds like your brother has a delicate personality, so it's likely best to cringe a bit internally but not necessarily feel that it's your responsibility to step in and tell him what to say and how to act in every single situation.

You mentioned that he's friendly and easygoing and that he likes people, so he's definitely holding these conversations in earnest from his point of view, even if they are noticeably awkward from your more experienced perspective. I trust that over time he will gradually be able to make adjustments to his dialogue and behavioral patterns, but he will always retain a core of the personality type and style that he has used thus far. Let him gradually find his way on his own unless you notice something extremely politically incorrect or that would be considered accidentally inappropriate or vulgar due to something he's unaware of. I don't think he would intentionally do anything wrong in a conversation, so it's best to be quite sparing in terms of your words to him on this topic.

MY BIG MOMENT IS GOING TO ARRIVE VERY SOON!

DR. WALLACE: I'm a girl, and I'm really excited because in two weeks I will turn 16 and a half years old. This exact point in time is really important to me because it's the specific age my parents said that I could begin dating boys at my school that they approve of.

I'm not worried about that, because I think most of the boys I'm going to want to date are going to be acceptable to my parents anyhow, so I'm more focused on the excitement and the anticipation of being able to go out on my first few dates of my life.

Fortunately for me, I have a lot of close friends, and I've already been comfortable talking to various boys at my school and other guys that I've met in different environments like at high school football games or outings at our local lake over the summer.

My question for you is, how do you think I could best make a lasting positive impression on a first date? And since some of these dates might be to go out to dinner, do you have any specific advice on how to act, behave or order my dinner when that time finally arrives? — Very Excited to Begin Dating, via email

VERY EXCITED TO BEGIN DATING: Congratulations on very soon reaching an important age in your life and entering a new chapter that you are so very much looking forward to. I think the best advice I can give you at this point is for you to be as prepared as possible going into these dates. Early dating among teenagers revolves around conversations and getting to know each other better from both sides.

Therefore, think about the topics you would like to talk about. Come up with some things you would like to share about yourself, and think of some good or even creative questions you would like to ask a guy who is your dating partner. Having a lot of this worked out in your mind ahead of time will help you to stay relaxed, prepared and ready to go in terms of having some hopefully fun and enjoyable conversations.

And when it comes to dinner, ask your parents or any older siblings you may have to guide you through how to navigate a formal or semiformal setting if you find yourself in a nice restaurant. The basic things are to relax, smile, communicate well with your server in a nice tone of voice, and always say "please" and "thank you" when you are making requests or receiving something you have asked for.

Showing a friendly, interactive personality and being grateful and attentive to those around you is the best way to behave in a public restaurant. Good luck; I wish you well and hope you have a lot of fun and develop some great experience in this new chapter of your life!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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