DR. WALLACE: My 18-year-old daughter lives at home and attends a local junior college. She recently got a job at a nice restaurant in our town.

She went through training and then was able to become a server on the Saturday afternoon shifts. Her hope was to be able to work her way up to working Saturday and Sunday evenings so she could make larger amounts of tips during the hours she would be working.

She was full of hope and excitement when she first got the job, but after a couple of days of working, she nonchalantly told me that she wanted to resign because she felt the managers were pushing her too hard. She doesn't have a scheduled shift again until this upcoming weekend, but I'm thinking of intervening and having a talk with her about pushing through and sticking with the job because it may turn out to be a good opportunity for her in the long run. What do you think, should I say anything at all or just let her make up her own mind with no input from me at this point? — Daughter Ready to Resign Over the First Hiccup, via email

DAUGHTER READY TO RESIGN OVER FIRST HICCUP: The nature of your letter indicates to me that you do feel you should speak up and say something and you're likely looking for confirmation from me to feel more confident in proceeding at this point.

It certainly is your decision, but I do agree that encouraging her to press on and stick with the job until something that's truly a dealbreaker may arise, which is hopefully not going to happen. Many times people who work together may get off to a bit of a conflicted start, but often end up developing mutual respect for each other and in the long run, sometimes even become friendly colleagues or personal friends.

This phenomenon also occurs in a variety of random relationships human beings find themselves in. If every person chose to cease and desist every time there was a small hiccup in any life situation, not much would be done or accomplished. If and when you do speak to your daughter about this, be more encouraging than anything else and certainly don't be condescending about her quick first impulse to let the job go. Instead, point out the job's benefits and ask her to look into the future, as a few weeks or a few months forward things may look very different and she may find herself looking back and being happy that she stuck with it. Conclude by telling her that if something very negative continues to persist or if other problems arise, she can always make a decision in the future to move on. Hopefully she'll think things through and show up this weekend to give it another go.

MY BROTHER CAN'T SEEM TO FUNCTION WITHOUT HIS SIDEKICK!

DR. WALLACE: I'm a guy who's a junior in college and I recently had the chance to see my younger brother play sports at his high school. He's also a pretty good athlete, but I was really surprised after hanging around with him and my family for the weekend that he had this other schoolmate whom he called his "sidekick." My brother seemingly can't do without having his "sidekick" near him at all times.

This other guy is not an athlete but apparently keeps all the statistics for the coaches and does a little bit of light sideline work, like bringing towels and water to the players during their games.

I was not only surprised that my brother had such a seemingly close relationship with this schoolmate who is a non-athlete, but that it almost looked like he couldn't function without his sidekick following him around.

Do you think it's appropriate for my brother, who is an excellent athlete, to have another student who obviously looks up to him tremendously, follow him around all weekend like his personal caddy? — My Brother Treats Him Like a Personal Assistant, via email.

MY BROTHER TREATS HIM LIKE A PERSONAL ASSISTANT: This young man who helped your brother out already has responsibilities with the team in general and he's obviously developed a friendship with your brother.

Even though you've only seen a snapshot of them together, you feel your brother may be taking advantage of him. I personally don't feel the same way. Many times friendships arise out of close working situations and some of them last for years, decades, or even a lifetime.

You certainly don't know all of the dynamics and history of the interaction of these two together and as long as your brother is treating him with respect and personal dignity, I don't see any problem with this situation at all. My advice is to not intervene here.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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