DR. WALLACE: Help, I'm a perfectionist! Not only do I try my utmost to get a perfect grade in every class I have at school, but I also do the same with my athletic pursuits. I play basketball and am good at the sport, but I feel more pain from missing a shot than I do joy from making a shot. This is especially intensified when I shoot free throws during a game. Right now, we are just starting our practices, but last year, I really felt angst whenever I missed a free throw shot with nobody guarding me.

How can I overcome this so that I can enjoy my studies this year and especially enjoy when I'm on the basketball court? — Perfection Is My Goal, via email

PERFECTION IS MY GOAL: Start by trying to "perfect" your understanding of the conception of perfection and the way you strive to achieve your goals.

Accordingly, realize that no one is perfect. Walter Clayton Jr. of Iona University was top free-throw shooter in 2023 in NCAA men's basketball with roughly 95% success at free throws. In professional basketball, the NBA's top free-throw shooter last season shot roughly 93% at the free-throw line. This means the top free-throw shooters in the world miss 5% to 7% of the time. Perfection is unattainable unless the pool of events is very small.

Once you reset your focus with the realization that perfection is not an option, you should focus on your methodology, techniques and preparation. This applies to your academics as well. Putting your time in this way will give you more satisfaction compared with the frustration of unrealistic expectations.

I'M FURIOUS ABOUT THIS

DR. WALLACE: I'm a parent and I have a beef to complain about. In our area, there have been two fatal drunk driving occurrences within the last three months! We live in a moderately sized town, about an hour and half from a major city that has several professional sports teams.

In each of these instances, the local media, law enforcement and first responders have referred to the fatal automobile collisions as "accidents." This infuriates me! Driving drunk is not an "accident"! It's a horrible decision by an individual who chose to get behind the wheel of an automobile despite drinking enough alcohol to be legally over the limit.

And in both cases, the drivers were under the legal age of 21 to even have consumed alcohol in the first place. I feel that we enable far too much in today's society, and calling willful, stupid and blatantly poor decisions "accidents" only continues to prolong our tolerance of drunk driving. Am I wrong to think this way? — An Enraged Parent of Two Teenagers, via email

AN ENRAGED PARENT OF TWO TEENAGERS: Your position is indeed correct in that driving an automobile legally drunk is a bad choice, not an accident. Any resulting collisions that result in damage, injuries or even death are almost certainly unintentional, yet a lack of intent is no accident, as you aptly put it.

For many decades I have felt that there should be zero tolerance for driving impaired by any substance that can impact a person's ability to operate a motor vehicle safely. Perhaps you can attempt to encourage media outlets, first responders and law enforcement in your area to use the word "collision" or "impact" instead of the word "accident." And an impact or collision that has terrible consequences could be referred to as a horrible collision by a "likely impaired driver."

Society is often slow to change its lingo, but there are recent changes to our language regarding several topics. I do agree with you that the word "accident" does not adequately describe a collision caused by driving under the influence.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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