DR. WALLACE: My boyfriend and I have been dating for a few months now. About a month ago, my family had to move to another town about an hour away from where we used to live. My boyfriend and I decided to continue going out together and see each other every Saturday. Before I had to move away, we saw each other every day, so it was a huge adjustment for me to see him only once a week due to the physical distance between us.

Last Saturday, I told him that I wanted to be able to go out with other guys every once in a while because I didn't want to sit at home alone every Friday night. I'm bored watching television or just browsing the internet to check out new music every weekend.

I thought my guy would like my suggestion because I'm sure when he's not with me, he's pretty bored, too. I also figured this would provide him permission to date other girls during the week himself.

To my utter surprise, he told me that if I ever dated another guy, he would never see me again. He also said he was very shocked to hear that I thought he'd be happy to hear I would even consider going out with another guy. I truly had no idea he was this serious about our brief relationship.

I'm only 17, and he just turned 18, and I can add that we've never had a discussion about marriage or anything even remotely like that yet! We've only been going out together since early August. I, for one, am not ready to get married anytime soon. I like him, but I also want my freedom to go out with other guys. Given my circumstances, do you feel I am being unreasonable? — Surprised by His Reaction, via email

SURPRISED BY HIS REACTION: Your request is most reasonable from my point of view. If he does break up with you, that's his choice to make. It is also apparent to me that there is a big disconnect between the two of you on just how serious your relationship is. His reaction surprised you, given how you viewed the relationship up to that point.

Sooner or later, you would have found out that he was too serious — and maybe too controlling — for you at this time in your life. To be fair, you did not mention any of his other behaviors that might indicate an unhealthy desire on his part to control you, but his "overreaction" in your eyes might be an indicator of future controlling behavior that you are now aware of.

In any case, it's best that you found out exactly how he feels. You now have the opportunity to make decisions that are in your own personal interest.

YOUR GRADES DON'T HAVE TO SUFFER

DR. WALLACE: What do you think is more important, getting all A's in my high school classes or having a part-time job after school and on weekends?

I have an after-school job that pays pretty well for someone my age, and as a further bonus, it gets me out of our house, which is cramped and loaded up with younger, bickering siblings who are always creating chaos!

I've been saving up and will soon have enough money to buy a used car. I'm 17 and have my driver's license, and I am a very responsible driver. I also admit that I like a little extra spending money, and why shouldn't I? I work hard to earn it. One of my parents and some of my friends keep lecturing me that my grades are super important and that I should not be spending time as a high school student working several hours each week. What is your opinion of my situation? — Working for a Car, via email

WORKING FOR A CAR: I believe it depends on the individual. There is no reason that a teen of your age can't work part time and maintain good grades in school.

I personally know many teens who work part-time jobs and whose grades don't suffer. Be sure to adjust your study times to keep your grades up and cut out some other activities, such as video gaming, for example. Some teens might need to cut down on social time or time spent on social media in order to work part time and maintain good grades.

Every teen in our nation gets the same 168 hours to live per week. It's what you choose to do (and not do!) with that time that determines your success in the areas of your life that are important to you.

You've chosen part-time work as a priority, and as long as that time does not come at the expense of your studies, I agree that you can successfully do both.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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