DR. WALLACE: I'm not writing for advice, but instead I wanted to share my experience with my fellow classmates.

I have always been a top student and involved in many activities. I was considered to be popular and had many friends. I planned on attending a college after I graduated and becoming an attorney. This is not going to happen. This past school year found me getting involved with anything that would get me "high," especially alcohol and drugs. I never thought I would ever be writing to you that I have these issues.

It all started when the guy I was dating convinced me to "have a drink" to make me forget that my parents had separated and were in the process of getting a divorce. The alcohol helped me forget some things, but only for a short time. Soon, I was asking for another drink, and then another and another. My parents weren't interested in me or what I was doing, since they had their own issues going on.

It didn't take long before I was using both alcohol and drugs. My grades dropped and I soon quit all of my student activities. Soon thereafter, my boyfriend and I broke up. It was easy to find drugs at parties — and, since I was a single girl, they were usually free.

I worry that I enjoy drugs so much that I will continue using them even if they might wind up killing me. I'm living now with a friend who is also into drugs. I will not be going to college.

My message to other teens: Please learn from my mistakes! Never get involved in any type of substance that is addictive, as it could rob you of your life and your soul. Your life can be beautiful if you never ever take that first alcoholic drink or try any drugs. For some people like me, one will lead to another and another. I, sadly, know this from personal experience. — Living With Regrets, via email

LIVING WITH REGRETS: Thank you so much for sharing your story with our teen readers. It may influence some of them to think twice and not follow your choices that have caused you such deep personal pain.

I'm very troubled that your desire to get high overpowers your plans to attend college and to reach your dream of becoming an attorney. I am aware of the powerful control the drugs and alcohol can have on their victims.

But I have also witnessed many young addicts stop using and return to productive, happy lives. It takes guts and the desire to be in control of your own life, and you can do it!

Never forget that life often offers opportunities for redemption. I trust you may have such opportunities cross your path at just the right time and that you are willing and wise enough to both recognize them and seize them.

WE ALL AGREE ON THIS

DR. WALLACE: I realize this is not 100% the way it is, but it's at least a trend. I am 18 years old and have been dating a guy for over a year, who is 19. The neat thing is we hope to be husband and wife someday.

I believe one of the reasons he respects me so much is that we have not had sex. When we first started dating, I made it clear I did not want to have a sexual relationship, and he never tried to pressure me to change my mind.

I'm writing this letter to all the girls who think that a sexual relationship is a good way to keep a boyfriend. They can be really wrong, as my experience indicates. In fact, sometimes it's the fastest way to lose a guy — and many girlfriends at my school agree with me on this point. We've discussed this at length, and we've come to a group agreement that it's best to just face this topic head-on at the beginning of a potential relationship. And if a first date gets canceled because of it, so be it. — Upfront and Honest, via email

UPFRONT AND HONEST: Thank you for sharing your perspective with our teen readers. I receive a high volume of mail that outline the same story you are sharing here. Congratulations to you and your friends for finding and incorporating a method that works for each of you. Honesty and full disclosure can, indeed, be a good policy.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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