DR. WALLACE: I'm a girl who is 16, and so is a new friend that I met a few months ago. We get along great and have a lot in common, so that's really good for me because our family just moved to this area at the beginning of the summer.

For the first few weeks, I was really lonesome, but I met this girl at a local event that my mom suggested I attend. So it's been great getting to know her and spending time with her, and of course, we will both be classmates in school when it starts soon.

But there's one problem I've noticed that kind of bothers me. Whenever we go over to her family's house, just before we go inside, she will tell me in a hurry to "not talk about" this and "don't say anything about" that, and "whatever you do, don't bring this up!" Basically, she is asking me not to talk about certain subjects in front of her parents, even though these are not bad topics and the two of us have done nothing wrong at all.

I don't know what the story is with her parents, or why she's so paranoid about speaking about normal things in front of them, but for whatever reason she does this every single time with like 20 or 30 seconds before we're going to go through her family's front door.

What do you think about this, and what can I do about it? It makes me really nervous, like I might say the wrong thing accidentally, so I basically hardly talk at all to her parents other than saying hello or goodbye. They probably think I'm really shy or something. — My New Friend Worries What Her Parents Hear, via email

MY NEW FRIEND WORRIES WHAT HER PARENTS HEAR: It appears you have a couple different choices here. You can continue not saying much in front of her parents, and perhaps you may want to visit her family home less frequently in the future.

Another path would be to talk to your friend openly about this situation when you are out doing something together away from her family's home. She may or may not want to get into details with you, but you could at least bring the subject up to see how she reacts and what her reasoning may be.

If, for whatever reason, you don't get satisfactory answers, and you continue to feel quite uncomfortable about this, you can always remain a friend of hers at school, but you don't necessarily need to remain best friends with her into the new school year. You will no doubt meet many other students for the first time, and it's inevitable that you will come across a few girls that will also have a lot in common with you as well.

Do your best to be polite and remain friendly if this happens, but you may need to do it from a bit more of a distance, depending upon what you do or do not find out about the reasoning as to why this is going on in this manner.

HIS SMOKY DONUTS ENDED MY DATE BEFORE IT STARTED!

DR. WALLACE: I met a guy who plays sports at our high school through some mutual friends at a summer outing, and we agreed to go on a date together. Everything was set up, we had scheduled it for a Saturday afternoon at about 3 p.m., and I was to be home by 8 p.m., so it seemed like everything was in place for me to have a good first date with this guy.

He's well known in high school as an athlete, and he has his own car, which is a newer model of a popular sports car. It looks really good, and I was looking forward to getting a ride in it. But when he showed up at our family home to pick me up, my father recognized him and canceled the date right then and there!

I heard this guy trying to reason with my father, but my father told him to turn around and leave because he was not welcome in our home. I came out and tried to say something, but my mother stepped in front of me and took me into the kitchen while my father walked him out the front door. I could see them talking in the driveway for a few minutes before this guy finally left.

When my father came back in, he told me why he canceled the date. He said that he had witnessed this exact guy in that exact car "burning rubber" and doing "donuts" in our local shopping mall's parking lot one evening about a week ago. There's a part of the mall parking lot that is generally wide open and empty, and my father said he was doing a lot of crazy driving with smoke going everywhere, and finally a police officer came in and stopped it. My dad said he watched the police officer talking to this guy for at least 10 minutes, then finally my dad had to leave as they were still talking.

My father told me that he didn't trust this guy, and I was forbidden from dating him or ever riding in his car! Both this guy and I are 17 years old, and of course we both still live at home, so my dad's definitely not going to allow me to date him. I know you can't do anything to change my father's mind, but my question to you is, do you think this is fair? Everyone makes mistakes, so why can't my father get over the fact that this guy used bad judgment in the parking lot? It's not like he got into a bad accident or anything. — My Father Vetoed My Date, via email

MY FATHER VETOED MY DATE: Unfortunately for you, your father witnessed this firsthand with his own eyes, and the moment he saw this young man coming into your home, the date was over before it ever started.

You are quite correct: As long as you're living in your father's home, you're unlikely to ever receive his permission to date this guy, star athlete or not.

Your father has a right to parent you and any of your siblings you may have in any reasonable manner that he sees fit. The bottom line is, he's trying to protect you even though you don't see this as being a problem the way he does. Your father is likely very dubious about your friend's judgment, and based upon what you have told me, I don't disagree with your father.

Someday you and this guy will turn 18 and may end up at some point moving out of your respective family homes. When this happens, and if the two of you are interested in potentially dating somewhere down the road, you'll be responsible for making your own judgment calls. But for now, this particular issue definitely feels to me like it is "case closed."

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Sam McNamara at Unsplash