I Feel Lost Without Her!

By Dr. Robert Wallace

August 27, 2025 6 min read

DR. WALLACE: I'm a girl who's about to go to high school as a freshman, and I'll confess to you that I'm in mourning. By mourning, I don't mean that anyone has passed away, but I'm mourning the loss of my very best friend, who moved with her family across the country to Florida this summer.

It would've been so much easier for me to have been able to have her by my side during the first day and week of high school. Even though I have some other casual friends, no one can replace the closeness I had with my best friend.

What can I do about this? I know I need to learn to go on without seeing her on a daily basis like I used to, but just knowing that doesn't make it any easier. Help! — Really Feeling the Loss, via email

REALLY FEELING THE LOSS: I can appreciate your situation and understand what you're saying. Having a close friend by your side makes so many elements of daily life. Much easier and more enjoyable.

It will absolutely take time for you to find someone new to spend more direct time with, so look at the coming days and weeks as an opportunity for your own personal growth. Have confidence in yourself, and tell yourself that you can do this and do it well. Also do your best to not be timid, relax as much as possible, take a few deep breaths a couple times a day, exhale slowly and put a smile on your face. Say hello to many people in the hallway, and always look to join conversations tactfully, even briefly.

Just by forcing yourself to interact with others will definitely help stave off loneliness and the feeling of separation. Gradually you'll settle into new routines and feel more at ease. Another bit of advice is to speak up in a few of your classrooms, particularly those in which you are quite comfortable with the course material. Other students will notice you, and your instructors will appreciate constructive interaction during class time. Doing this regularly will inevitably lead to others coming up to you to ask you questions about the course material and even perhaps requesting your presence for a study session outside of class hours. I feel that before too long, you'll be well on your way to feeling a lot better and knowing more people, which will greatly enhance your comfort as you settle into high school life.

OUR LAKE TRIP ENDED IN DISASTER!

DR. WALLACE: My boyfriend, a great guy who I've been dating for the past eight months, had been driving me around this summer from time to time using his older brother's car when it was available.

His older brother was home from college and would loan the keys to my boyfriend occasionally so we could travel places together. His brother is 21 and a junior in college.

Last weekend, my boyfriend drove me home after a day of hiking and fishing at a local lake with some of our friends. He parked the car in our driveway, and in the trunk of the car, we took out some extra clothes and a backpack I had put in there because we drove other friends home first and there wasn't a lot of room in the car for my extra belongings.

My father was outside watering the lawn at the time we arrived, and he walked over to say hello to us as we were unpacking things. Unfortunately, my father was able to see into the trunk, and there were four empty beer cans in the trunk of the car! We had not been drinking at all during the day; these beer cans were likely from his brother's activities.

My father yelled at my boyfriend and me despite our protest and denial that we had anything to do with the beer cans. Now my father is telling me that I'm forbidden to date this guy anymore.

I'm telling you the truth here. What can we do about this unfortunate situation? — My Father Won't Listen to Reason, via email

MY FATHER WON'T LISTEN TO REASON: You've learned quite a hard lesson here, unfortunately. Once you, your boyfriend or anyone else in your group noticed old beer cans in the trunk of that vehicle you were driving, you should've disposed of them immediately at any suitable trashcan or recycling location near the lake or hiking trail.

If possible, speak to your mother about the situation, and maybe ask her if your father would listen to the older brother explain why those beer cans were in the trunk in the first place.

Trust is a very important thing, and it cuts both ways. Your father was out of line to make such an assumption and fly off the handle so quickly. The situation you are describing is obviously now over, but in those moments you would've had an opportunity to show him the beer cans were dry and that your breath was alcohol-free. At least your father was able to see that you were speaking normally to him, so you can mention this to your mother or any other responsible adult you can bring this matter up with.

Finally, you can have your boyfriend volunteer to sit down with your father for a one-on-one discussion to alleviate your father's concerns. This may give him an opportunity to explain the situation in an earnest and calm fashion that your father may find acceptable — hopefully so.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Danny Chen at Unsplash

Like it? Share it!

  • 0

'Tween 12 & 20
About Dr. Robert Wallace
Read More | RSS | Subscribe

YOU MAY ALSO LIKE...