DR. WALLACE: In one of your recent columns, a girl named Janet, 16, had been taking piano lessons for over two years and was tired of them because she didn't enjoy playing and wanted to quit. Her parents wanted her to continue, hoping that one day she would love to play and continue playing and stop saying her lessons were a waste of money.
I was surprised that you agreed with her decision to stop playing the piano. Shame, shame on you!
Are you not aware, Dr. Wallace, that music soothes a troubled mind and brings joy and comfort to every human being and animal on this planet? Music is the universal language that promotes peace and understanding. Music instills in us the desire to be joyous and is given to us as a gift by the Almighty. Music is wisdom. Music is courage. Music is strength. Music is kindness. Music is love. And most of all, music is holy.
Please contact this young lady and tell her you have changed your mind and that she should continue her piano lessons. She will be glad someday that she did. — Mother, Galesburg, Ill.
MOTHER: It's great that you love music, but your admonition is confused and no, I will not change my mind. Music is everything you say it is, and more, but that doesn't mean it should be forced down someone's throat.
Let's say the writer had been a boy who wanted to quit Little League baseball after two years in the program because he was sick of it and did not enjoy playing at all. While I love athletic competition, I would have encouraged his parents to let him drop out. Playing shortstop isn't for everyone, and neither is playing the piano.
If you do not love the instrument, and, after two years, consider your lessons a waste of money, something's wrong and you should be allowed to stop. Music, like athletic competition, is a serious and demanding discipline, but it should never be drudgery. Parents are right to expose their children to it, but at a certain point whether to continue or not must be the child's choice.
If this were not the case, music would cease to bring joy to his listeners. Furthermore, you don't have to be a musician to experience the joy.
SHOULD I MIND MY OWN BUSINESS
DR. WALLACE: My ex and I dated for three months and I dumped him for a lot of his horrible behaviors — drugs, alcohol, sexual aggression and filthy language.
My best friend's cousin is now dating this jerk. I know who she is, but I don't know her well. Should I tell her about this guy's "extra-curricular" activities, or should I keep quiet and mind my own business? — Anonymous, via email
ANONYMOUS: Make it a point to inform this young lady about your unhappy experience with your ex. Answer any questions she might pose, but once you have had your say, do not discuss your ex with her again unless she contacts you. This way you give her the opportunity to learn more if she chooses to know. I trust you would feel the same way if the situation were reversed.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
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