DR. WALLACE: Our daughter is a model child. She is a very good student, both in academics and citizenship. It's quite different for our son. He doesn't try in school, so his grades are poor and so is his citizenship.

I met with his counselor the last week of school and he told me our son is capable of getting good grades, but that he simply doesn't put forth the effort. He also said that lately he has been hanging around with a group suspected of being involved with drugs.

Please advise us what to look for concerning a child who might be using drugs. We will do all in our power to ensure that he is drug-free and our first step is to monitor the friends he hangs with. — Mother, Springfield, Mo.

MOTHER: The Healthcare Medical Center in Tustin, California, has devised a list of 20 yes-or-no questions for parents who feel their teen might be using drugs. Each "yes" answer indicates a possible drug problem. If the answer is "yes" three or more times, perhaps the teen should see a professional to determine if there is drug abuse and what can be done about it. Please answer the following questions:

—Has your teen's personality changed noticeably? Have you noticed sudden mood swings to irritability, depression, hostility or anger?

—Is he or she becoming less responsible?

—Are you missing money, objects or liquor from your home?

—Has your teen experienced any problems with the law?

—Have other people commented on your teen's negative behavior?

—Are there signs of unexplained physical or emotional problems?

—Has your teen lost interest in school, sports or extracurricular activities?

—Is your teen reluctant to introduce new friends to you?

—Is your teen frequently dishonest?

—Has your teen recently acted irresponsibly?

—Does your teen withdraw, or avoid communication with family members?

—Is your teen involved in frequent arguments with you and others?

—Have you found any drugs, alcohol or paraphernalia in your home?

—Have you noticed obvious physical signs of drug or alcohol use, e.g., alcohol on the breath, dilated pupils or bloodshot eyes?

—Does your teen avoid talking about issues related to such use?

—Does your teen have difficulty controlling his or her temper?

—Have you noticed a change in eating or sleeping patterns?

—Does your teen's value system appear to be deteriorating?

—Have you ever considered counseling for your teen?

—Is your teen becoming a stranger to you?

Your son might be drug-free even though his friends use drugs, but you certainly have far more cause for concern than you would if he hung around with kids whose interests didn't include illicit substances. It's very wise to monitor who your son is hanging around with. I'm a "birds of a feather flock together" believer.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.