DR. WALLACE: I have been with my boyfriend for about two years and have gotten very close and comfortable with him. We basically do everything together and spend a lot of time hanging out, having fun and talking about life and future goals.

I am very happy with how close we are but feel like as time has gone on in our relationship he doesn't put in as much effort as he used to. I wish he would do the small things for me like getting me flowers or writing me heartfelt notes like he did in the early days when we first met.

Those things would make me very happy and feel appreciated even more on an ongoing basis. I obviously don't want to ask him to do these things for me because I want him to do it because he wants to. Yet at the same time I want to feel appreciated! What can I do about this? — Seeking Special Appreciation, via email

SEEKING SPECIAL APPRECIATION: If you wish for this to happen again at this point, I suggest you start first to get the ball rolling again! Take the time to write him a nice note and slip it to him at the right time.

Bring him a small portion of his favorite snack, dessert or any small item you know he likes and cares about. Remind him of how much you loved his attentions in this department back when you met and explain that you want him to always know how you feel about him.

Do this a few times and chances are he will get the message and soon reciprocate in kind back to you. Don't make it a competition or keep score on who has done more, but rather seek to always keep your relationship fun, earnest, respectful and yes, appreciated.

I WORRY I'M TOO EMOTIONAL

DR. WALLACE: I'm a boy who just turned 14. I worry that sometimes I get too emotional, and I even cry a little bit when I see something sad or hear a really sad story about someone.

I play some sports here and there and I have good friends that are both boys and girls, but I worry that I'll be laughed at if others see me even shed a small tear in class or during a movie we might be watching together.

Is there anything I can do about this? Is there something wrong with me for feeling this way? — Kind of Emotional, via email

KIND OF EMOTIONAL: Crying is a natural human response to emotional sorrow or even physical pain. When you or anyone else experiences emotional empathy in this manner it is nothing at all to be ashamed about. In fact, it shows that you are a person who feels events deeply and that you have great empathy for others, which is indeed an admirable trait.

The idea that males of any age should not show emotions is vastly outdated and should be eliminated from any societal pressure. If someone happens to notice your emotions in this way, don't run from them. Instead, look the person in the eyes and simply say, "I can empathize with that sad situation." Trust me, 99% of boys, girls, men and women will respect you and think more of you, not less.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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