DR. WALLACE: I'm 19 and my guy is 20. We have been together as boyfriend and girlfriend for over a year, and I want to get married very soon; in fact, the sooner the better would suit me. My boyfriend and I love each other very much. There is no doubt about this.

My parents like him, but they don't feel that we have known each other long enough. They want us to wait another full year. How long do you think a couple should know each other before getting married? If you yourself are married, how long did you and your wife date before tying the knot? - Ready to Become a Wife, via email

READY TO BECOME A WIFE: I can't tell you how long you and your boyfriend should know each other before you decide to marry, as each couple should follow their own emotional and practical timeline.

A marriage should take place whenever you and your boyfriend mutually decide to become husband and wife.

Make sure that you are financially independent; that will increase your odds of happiness during your early years of marriage. My wife and I met in college and married after graduation. My wife and I believe now that we made the right choice because we have happily enjoyed being husband and wife for a very long time.

TIME AND DISTANCE PRESENT A CHALLENGE

DR. WALLACE: My boyfriend and I are attending college in different cities because we each need to study different fields for our respective majors and planned career paths.

We originally agreed that we would see each other once a week at the very least, and hopefully a little more often as time permits. Well, it's been several months now, and we've only seen each other a grand total of three times!

This is not acceptable to me, so what should I do to see my boyfriend more often? The good news is that we just finished up our respective semesters, but the tough news is that we are both enrolled in several summer classes now. What can I do? — Need More Time with My Guy, via email

NEED MORE TIME WITH MY GUY: You and your boyfriend could spend more time together if you both would make it your top priority. For some reason, this has not been happening regularly at all.

I think an open and heartfelt discussion with your boyfriend is in order. Remind him of the original plan the two of you made together and ask him if anything has changed on his end to cause the obvious changes that have evolved since then.

You didn't mention possible work and study schedules, so it could be due to massive time conflicts. But there could also be other potential reasons as well. The two of you owe it to each other to be honest and to try to hold things together if you both agree that a plan is still a mutual top priority. Any time a couple faces challenges, both parties must work hard to keep the relationship strong. Be open and honest with him during this discussion and encourage him to do the same.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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