DR. WALLACE: I'm 15 and have a mild case of acne. If I don't seek medical attention, how long can I expect to have a poor complexion? I notice that rarely does an adult ever have acne. —Anonymous, via email
ANONYMOUS: For most people, complexion problems start and end during the teen years, but according to experts in the field, acne can cause problems for some adults into their late 30s. A few people battle acne their entire lives.
You should visit a dermatologist now. You don't have to sit around hoping your acne we'll disappear. With proper treatment, your acne problem will in all likelihood improve dramatically or be eliminated in a short period of time.
STEPFATHER HAS WISDOM AND KINDNESS
DR. WALLACE: My mom and dad were divorced and my mom and I lived together until recently in an apartment. My mom said that if all my grades were B or better, I wouldn't have to do household chores. For the past year I've kept my grades up, so I didn't have to do any chores to do. This also gave me more time to do my homework.
Last month, my mother married her boss at work and we have moved into her new husband's house. He has two daughters of his own from a previous marriage. One is my age and the other is two years older. My stepfather seems nice and so do my stepsisters. They all have gone out of their way to make me feel at home. Both of my stepsisters have household chores to do.
My stepfather asked me what chores I had when mom and I were in the apartment and he was surprised when I told him I didn't have any. I told him that my mom and I had an agreement that as long as all my grades were B or above I wouldn't have to do any chores, so that I could have more time to study. Then he said his daughters both were honor students, but they still have household chores to do.
He said it was up to me to decide if I wanted to continue not doing chores or joining in with the other girls and be assigned chores in this new household. He told me he would not be upset if I chose not to do chores because he would honor the agreement my mom and I had previously.
I talked to my mom and she said it was up to me to make that choice. I don't know what to do. Will you help, please? —Anonymous, via email
ANONYMOUS: Your stepfather handled this potential conflict with wisdom and kindness, nipping it in the bud. I applaud him for his sensitivity to the agreement you had worked out with your mother.
Now I suggest you embrace the spirit of your new household and take on at least some chores. I'm positive your grades won't suffer because the time spent helping out at home — after all you have two new sisters who are helping out too. And by pitching in, you'll truly enhance your feeling of belonging to your new family. Believe me, you'll feel much happier helping out and contributing to the common good than separating yourself from your stepsisters, who have embraced you as a sibling. A successful blended family requires give and take on both sides. Your stepfather has stepped up; now it's your turn.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
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