DR. WALLACE: My boyfriend gave me a pair of expensive sunglasses for my birthday. One of my close friends told me my boyfriend stole these glasses from a fancy department store. When I asked my boyfriend about this, he admitted he's wiped out. He explained he didn't have the money to pay for them, and he knew how much I really wanted them as a birthday gift.

Now what do I do with them? Should I keep them, throw them away or give them back to my boyfriend? One of my close girlfriends thinks I should just keep them. She thinks it's sweet that he took such a big risk to steal them just to please me. She said he's like a modern Robin Hood.

Please give me your advice. I love these sunglasses, and they are exactly the ones I wanted. But now I feel really guilty, and even dirty, whenever I wear them. — Shaded and Confused, via email

SHADED AND CONFUSED: Your boyfriend is not a Robin Hood; he is a shoplifter, and that makes him a criminal. Your girlfriend has a warped sense of values. Find out exactly where your boyfriend stole the sunglasses, and mail them back to the department store with a note explaining that someone stole them to give them to you as a birthday gift and that you understand they came from that exact store.

When you do this, please do this right. Take care to clean the glasses carefully and put them back in the original packaging the very best you can. Be sure to pack them carefully in bubble wrap in a small cardboard box so that they are not damaged as they are shipped back to that store's returns department.

My next bit of advice for you is to unload your boyfriend. His character has a serious flaw — as does your girlfriend's. At the very least, let her know that you will take pride in doing the right thing, and returning a stolen item is definitely the right thing to do.

FATHER'S LAST NAME NOT VALUED

DR. WALLACE: My teenage daughter has now had two children out of wedlock. I think that they should carry her maiden name, but she disagrees. Her unemployed, jobless boyfriend is the father of both children. I feel it's disgraceful to give my grandchildren the name of a bum like him.

What are your thoughts on this subject? Am I too old-fashioned about this? — Grumpy Mom, Athens, Georgia

GRUMPY MOM: The final decision regarding the last name of your daughter's children solely rests with your daughter, not you. Your opinion of the children's father is not a factor here.

The best you can do is lobby gently for your daughter to consider using her maiden name for the children. In these times, you might also suggest a hyphenated last name — with yours in the lead position, of course. With a little luck, she might consider it!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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