DR. WALLACE: I'm 15 and really worried about my mom. A good friend of mine works at a grocery store where she shops and he told me that she has been stealing things from the store. He said he saw her putting things in her purse several times. He didn't tell the manager because he knows my mom and me and wanted to let me know.

I really didn't believe it, but the next time I went shopping with Mom I kept my eye on her from a distance. I was devastated to see her put two cans of tuna into her purse. She left the store without paying for them.

We're not rich, but we have everything we need and never have any problems. We are a close family and I feel I should tell my dad for Mom's sake, but I don't know If that's the best thing to do. I think this has just started happening and I want to stop it from continuing. Can you help me? — Nameless, Rockford, Ill.

NAMELESS: Your mom's behavior has put you in a real bind, but the fact that you learned about it before she got herself into embarrassing trouble is a blessing.

If she has not shoplifted before, then something has happened in her life to cause her to do so now. I suggest you have a talk with her in private before you do anything else. Tell her you saw her put the tuna in her purse and that your friend also has spotted her stealing items from the grocery store.

Knowing that she's been discovered may be enough to get Mom to talk about what's going on with her. Make sure you let her know you love her, and encourage her to discuss everything with your father. He can provide her with moral support and, if necessary, see that she gets the help she needs. If she doesn't tell Dad, you must tell him. Mom may have a serious problem that she can't solve by herself.

YOU SHOULD BE GIVEN A CREDIT CARD

DR. WALLACE: I will graduate from high school soon and will be attending Iowa State University in the fall. I graduated with a B+ average and I am a very good citizen. Never one time was I in trouble at school or in our community. I attend church regularly, and I sing in the church choir.

I've never had a job other than babysitting for my older sister's twins. My parents didn't want me to work because they believed it would interfere with my schoolwork. They provided me with an adequate allowance so I was rarely broke. My parents are paying all of my university expenses, for which I'm very grateful. They also will give me an allowance for my social activities.

That's all good, but I also want to have my own credit card to be used in an emergency. My parents don't like the idea. They said they would take care of all my emergencies. Dr. Wallace. I really do want the use of a credit card - "just in case." I would never use it recklessly.

Without giving a long dissertation, please give me a simple yes or no answer. Would it be in my best interest to have my own credit card? I am a very disciplined teen and am also very reliable. — Nameless, Des Moines, Iowa.

NAMELESS: Yes!

At the risk of appearing to give a long dissertation, I'd like to add that learning to use a credit card responsibly is part of the long process of maturing. I believe that college-age teens who have demonstrated sound judgment need, and deserve to be trusted to manage their finances. Parents need to let go of total financial control over their children.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.