DR. WALLACE: I'm 16 and dating a boy who is 18. I'm a sophomore and he is a senior. We enjoy being together, but we're not too serious. My mother likes the boy and so does my father, but he says Tim's too old for me. Mom disagrees.
Will you please break the tie? — Nameless, Peoria, Ill.
NAMELESS: The two-year age difference is insignificant. Your dad should be happy he likes the guy you're dating. There's no need to manufacture a problem where none exists.
STOP THE AFFAIR NOW
DR. WALLACE: I'm an 18-year-old girl and a high school graduate. I'm in love with a guy at work who happens to be 29 and he is also in love with me.
I remember you once said in a column that, once a person graduates from high school, a large age difference in a relationship isn't so important. I wish you would print that letter again so my parents will see it and quit trying to make me stop seeing Dylan.
Just as soon as Dylan can save up enough money to get a divorce and pay child support, we plan to get married. I don't think the age difference matters, do you? We are both old enough and we are very much in love and sexually active. — Abigail, Jackson, Miss.
ABIGAIL: Age difference is hardly the problem in this relationship, although from your letter, I have to conclude that you're far too young and naive to be thinking seriously about marriage. You're having sex with a guy who's married and has at least one child. He belongs at home taking care of his family, not trying to "save up" to get rid of it and take up housekeeping with you.
Wise up, Abigail! If you did marry this louse, how long do you think it would be before someone else took your place in his life as the "other woman"?
More importantly, professing love for and having sex with a married man is wrong, and I'm sure you know it. I urge you to listen to your parents and stop this affair NOW!
IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO LET HIM GO
DR. WALLACE: Andrew and I had been going together for over four months. He broke up with Cheryl to go out with me. Then last Saturday, Andrew and I had a huge fight and broke up because of our differences.
When I called him this week to patch things up, I was stunned to find out that he was already dating Cheryl again. I think it was mean of him not to let me know that he was thinking of dating her again. We had been going out for over four months and I would never have guessed he'd go back to her.
I also think Cheryl was sneaking around trying to get Andrew back ever since he broke up with her. A friend of mine told me that as soon as Cheryl heard of our break-up she started chasing him big-time. It wasn't him that was chasing her.
What should I do now? I could be aggressive and try to get him back again. Or I could just pretend that it doesn't bother me, and date other guys until he gets tired of her and dumps her. But since he has behaved like a no-good louse, I should probably just put him out of my life forever.
What do you think I should do? — Shelly, South Bend, Ind.
SHELLY: I don't think Andrew has done anything that qualifies him as a no-good louse, but I definitely think it's time for you to let him go. He's just the guy in the middle, caught in a nasty game of tug-o-war between you and Cheryl.
You won't be happy until you stop playing the game.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected] To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
Photo credit: Jeremy Segrott