DR. WALLACE: I'm 18 and have been dating a guy for over seven months. He is really a cute guy, and intelligent with a great sense of humor. I really like him a lot and would consider marrying him if he didn't have one problem. He drinks too much.

Even though he is only 19, he has no problem getting alcohol from his friends and even from his older brothers. I've tried to convince him that life would be much better if he didn't drink, but he says that he enjoys drinking with his buddies. He told me that if we ever decide to get serious he would quit if I really wanted him to.

He has a good job working for a fish plant. I do give him credit for the fact that he never drinks when he will be driving. Since I don't drink at all, I always drive even if he has had only one beer.

My parents don't like him because my older brother works at the same fish plant and he told us that my boyfriend always brags at work about how much alcohol he can drink without getting smashed. I've only seen him get smashed about a dozen times since we've been dating. It's not like he drinks every single day or even every time we go out, but he does enjoy it.

Do you think that he would actually give up alcohol if we got serious? I'm pretty sure your answer will be no, but I want to make sure. I really can't see myself marrying a guy who abuses alcohol. — Nameless, Portland, Maine.

NAMELESS: Alcohol is such a powerfully addictive drug, that rarely can a hard drinker quit without outside help. Don't even think about marrying this guy unless he goes through an alcohol rehabilitation program and you are convinced that he is alcohol-free.

If he cares enough for you to make that commitment, he could be marriage material. No commitment, no marriage!

FLUENCY IN MORE THAN ONE LANGUAGE IS GOOD

DR. WALLACE: I'm 19, married and expecting our first baby in three months. I was born in Mexico and speak fluent Spanish and broken English. I've been in the United States for seven years, so I understand English very well. I speak English with a heavy Spanish accent (although most people can understand me).

My husband's parents were born in Germany, but he was born in the United States. His parents spoke English at home so he would be fluent in English and not have a problem in school. He doesn't speak any German.

I want my baby (it will be a girl) to learn Spanish and English. My husband wants her to learn only English until she is in school. I'd like your opinion on this. — Maria, San Antonio, Tex.

MARIA: It's most important for your daughter to be fluent in English, of course, but that doesn't have to rule out her mastering Spanish as well. Children of bilingual parents are in a unique position to be bilingual themselves, since their capacity to absorb language at an early age is so great.

According to Francois Thibaut, founder of the Language Workshop for Children in New York's Foreign Language School, babies as young as 6 months can start to learn two languages.

As you well know, fluency in more than one language is a huge asset, especially in today's complex world. I wish you the best of luck in giving your daughter the best of both worlds.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Ryosuke Yagi