DR. WALLACE: I'm finishing up my senior year in high school and will turn 18 soon. I'm starting to realize that I need to begin planning seriously for my future. I'm the type of person who likes to live in the moment, and my days have a way of turning into weeks, which become months, and my months then become full school years that rolled by quickly! During all of this, I did no advance planning.

It seems that many of my friends have been prepping for college and their future jobs for a long time, while in my world, I've just been enjoying being a teenager and building a lot of good friendships and great memories.

How can I catch up when it comes to setting goals and hopefully achieving them? I'd like to go to college and get a good job too, but I don't have a clue where to start. Any ideas? — My Future Life Is Approaching Fast, via email

MY FUTURE LIFE IS APPROACHING FAST: Start by setting goals for yourself. Write out an overall goal at the top of a piece of paper, then list as many steps as you can think of that will be necessary to achieve that goal. Then, by looking at those steps, you can arrange them into a sequence that makes the most logical sense to you. From there seek to achieve a few of these smaller "step" goals each day. This will get you a couple of steps closer each day to your larger goal.

Once you complete many of your small steps, your overall goal will come into better focus and will seem much more achievable.

There are many great books, websites, blogs and videos about goal-setting and achievement that exist today. Make one of your first small steps be researching these resources as soon as possible! Setting, tracking and systematically pursuing goals can be a very empowering exercise. This exercise can help change your mindset and mentality toward your future in a very positive way. I wish you every success upon your journey.

MY FATHER THINKS I'M BEING MANIPULATIVE WHEN I CRY

DR. WALLACE: I'm not going to tell you my gender, but I will tell you that I am 15 years old and a freshman in high school. I'm a good student, I don't get into trouble and I'm pretty responsible in many ways.

However, I have kind of a fragile ego and certain things upset me, sometimes to the point of actual tears. I do find this embarrassing, but it's not something I can always control. Sometimes certain situations arise that cause me to suddenly start crying. I can usually choke the tears off within 30 to 45 seconds, so it's not like I am sobbing and weeping for a long time.

But I do get choked up, and a few real tears roll down my cheeks. Whenever this happens, my father gets really mad at me. My mother is more sympathetic, but my father thinks that crying for the reasons I burst into tears is totally unacceptable. He often tells me I'm far too old to be pulling "this stuff" so often. But I don't do it on purpose!

What can I do to get my father to stop scolding me about this? It's embarrassing enough that I must deal with the situation on my own. — My Tears Fall Easily, via email

MY TEARS FALL EASILY: Tell your father that you recently wrote to an advice column and the columnist advised you that in his opinion your tears are quite unlikely to be contrived, but actually are an involuntary response to circumstances that cause you brief emotional duress or confusion.

Over the years I have spoken to several psychiatrists and read many reports on this topic, and most indicate that crying is a natural response to feeling hurt, injured, slighted or damaged in some way. This pain can be physical, mental or emotional in nature, and the trigger sources can vary widely from individual to individual.

Crying also provides a needed release for extreme frustration and even ongoing anger. In cases such as this, a brief cry can be beneficial and often cathartic. Your gender makes no difference here; your father should be much more understanding, especially at your age. Also, at 15 years of age, your mind and emotions are still in the process of development, and this likely is causing you to have wider swings in your emotions now than you perhaps will experience in the future.

Many parents understand this and seek to support their children when they go through various phases of life such as the one you're experiencing now. Perhaps your father can read your letter and my reply with an open mind, and my wish for you is that he may reevaluate his position on this topic and provide you some latitude and support at this time in your life.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: okmarian at Pixabay