DR. WALLACE: We live in an apartment complex with a lot of other people. We are a family of four and we keep down the noise at our place because we want to be considerate of our neighbors. However, our next-door neighbors clearly don't share the same concern; they are very loud and have many late-night gatherings at their apartment that go on until 2 or 3 a.m. sometimes. Some members of my family have to get up very early on weekends to go to work, and this noise really cuts into the time we all can rest.

And even worse, these gatherings often end up partially outside, because their apartment isn't big enough for all the people who come over. What's weird is that they have consistently been having these gatherings right through the worst of the COVID-19 pandemic. I thought we were not supposed to be gathering in large groups, but these folks have regularly had 25 to 40 people milling around until the middle of the night, and nobody has said one word about it.

I'm just wondering if there's anything I can say or do to get my neighbors to be more considerate. I don't want to start a fight with them, but I really don't want to keep hearing all of the late-night noise, either. — Sleepless Next-Door Neighbor, via email

SLEEPLESS NEXT-DOOR NEIGHBOR: I suggest you pay your neighbor a visit during the daytime, perhaps in the midafternoon, and politely introduce yourself if you haven't already met them.

Request nicely that they keep the noise down on your behalf since members of your family work early on weekends. If the polite, direct approach doesn't provide you the relief you seek, then it's time to contact your landlord or building manager. If it comes to this, you will be able to tell the property manager that you tried to politely take care of the situation on your own before you requested their help. Any landlord or property manager worth their salt will understand that at this point, the proverbial ball is in their court and it's truly their responsibility to take steps to remedy the situation.

I find that in many matters, it's easier to garner earnest and even sympathetic support on an issue if you've first made a good-faith attempt to take care of it yourself. Let's hope that the building owners are able to provide you the relief you deserve.

CAR OR DRIVER?

DR. WALLACE: My father is convinced that it's the vehicle and not the driver that determines the severity of an accident if one happens to occur. My dad thinks that if I am in a big, sturdy car, I won't get in a bad accident that could really hurt me.

I went on several dates with this guy who had a van, and my dad was happy because he kept praising the van for being like a "tank." My dad thought that the van was built stronger, so it would be safer if it were ever involved in an accident.

Fortunately, we didn't have any accidents on the road, but now I've elected to stop dating this guy. And you guessed it, my new boyfriend drives a small electric vehicle. Now my father keeps complaining that I'll never be safe "in that tin can!"

So, my question for you is: What do you feel is more important? Is it the type of car I ride in on my dates, or is it the skill and attentiveness of the driver that good old dad should be most concerned about? — Daddy's Girl, via email

DADDY'S GIRL: Your father should always be concerned about who his daughter is going out on a date with and that your date is a safe and sober driver. It matters less what type of car you are a passenger in; just make sure that the driver is alert and safe.

And no matter who drives and which type of vehicle you're riding in, please always remember to wear your seat belt.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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