DR. WALLACE: I'm 14 and live alone with my mom, and I like it like that. When I was younger she told me that she has never been married because my father joined the military, and then she never heard from him again.
Mom is a secretary at a law office, and she really enjoys working there. About three months ago, she started going out with one of the single lawyers. He has been over to our house six or seven times. He seems nice, but I really don't know him that well.
Last Saturday night, the three of us when out to a dinner at a fancy restaurant. After we ate, mom said that she had something important to tell me: She and Vince are getting married in a month and that she is in love. Vince says that he loves my mom and is happy that he is going to be my father. I should have been happy, but all I could think of was that he was soon going to be living in our house and he was going to be spending a lot of time with my mom. I'm not sure I'm going to like this arrangement. Am I being selfish? —Nameless, Springfield, Ill.
NAMELESS: I understand your concern. You and your mother have been a happy, loving twosome for 14 years. Things will be different once your new dad moves in. But most importantly, mom and your new dad love each other; you seem to think he is nice; and he said he is happy that he's going to be your father. It will take time for the new family to adjust. But I'm positive the new family will love and enjoy each other and live happily ever after!
EVEN HARVARD HAS A FOOTBALL TEAM
DR. WALLACE: I'm a sophomore at a prestigious prep school and I disagree with the advice you gave a ninth grader, who said he didn't have time to play sports and still do his homework because of after-school practice.
You devised a schedule for him to study from 7:15 PM to 8:45 PM p.m. every school night and still be active in sports. That's a joke. If I studied for only an hour and a half night, I never have the grades to reach the level of class valedictorian, which would give me an automatic scholarship to Harvard University.
Anytime athletics compromise study (which is almost all the time), the student should forget competition on the playing fields and courts and concentrate on the competition in the classroom. Next time you promote athletics at the expense of academics, please remember my letter. It might change your view! —Ian, Deerfield, Mass.
IAN: I agree that academics should never become compromised for athletics but in most cases a well-organized student athlete, either male or female, can maintain the highest academic standards and still participate in sports.
When I was an English teacher and varsity basketball coach at Hiawatha high school in Kirkland Illinois, Gene Lamont was all state in both baseball and basketball and plus was the quarterback on the football team. He was also a star in the classroom and graduated with a straight A average. Gene went on to an outstanding career in major league baseball as a player, coach and manager and even won the 1993 American League manager of the year with the Chicago White Sox.
When you arrive at Harvard, you will notice that this prestigious university is a member in good standing of the National Collegiate Athletic Association. It fields men's teams in football, baseball, track and field and many other sports. The women's athletic program also provides a full schedule, including basketball, softball, field hockey, tennis and swimming.
Providing students with a good academic education is a school prime function, but extra curricular programs help make a student well rounded.
Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
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