DR. WALLACE: I'm 17 and the boy I'm dating is 18. I'm considered rather attractive, but the guy I'm dating is no "Pretty Boy." He's not ugly, but he is not real cute either. Still, he is very popular at school. His main attraction is that he has a marvelous sense of humor and he knows how to make me laugh. My older brother keeps telling me that he isn't a good catch and that with my looks I could do much better.

Do guys and girls look for different things when dating? Is this possible? My brother and his male buddies are always talking about all the good-looking "babes" they have dated. My girlfriends and I talk about the neat guys we know, but rarely do we zero in on their looks. We seem to appreciate their great personalities. - Nameless, Davenport, Iowa.

NAMELESS: Several years ago, I asked readers what attribute they considered most important in a member of the opposite sex when it comes to dating. The choices were: intelligence; looks; personality and a good sense of humor, being alcohol-and drug-free, being of the same race and religion, and having use of a motor vehicle.

Over 3,000 teens responded. For the girls, 49 percent listed being alcohol-and drug-free as most important, followed by personality and sense of humor (27 percent), intelligence (11 percent), same race and religion (9 percent) looks (3 percent), and use of a motor vehicle (1 percent).

Not surprisingly, the boys had different priorities when selecting a date. For them, looks ranked first (34 percent), closely followed by personality and sense of humor (33 percent), intelligence (14 percent), same race and religion (11 percent), being alcohol-and drug-free (7 percent) and use of a motor vehicle (1 percent).

This was not a scientific survey, but I believe it gives a pretty accurate picture of what males and females look for in each other. P.S.: It took almost two days to compute the data!

FIND OUT WHAT HER INTERESTS ARE

DR. WALLACE: There is a certain girl at school that I would like to get to know better. But my problem is that I'm shy, and even though I'm a good high school athlete and a rather popular student, I've never had a girlfriend or been on a date.

Any help that you can give me to "break the ice" would be appreciated. And, needless to say, please don't print my name. — Shy Guy, Portland, Maine.

SHY GUY: I suggest you do a little preliminary work. Ask around and find out what this girl's interests are, and then, at an opportune moment, bring up the subject.

Start out, for example, by saying, "Hi, I understand you're a big fan of the Iowa Hawkeyes," or "I saw you in the school play and you were terrific." Once you've broken the ice, ask her questions that require more than one-word answers and listen with interest.

Don't push the first conversation to be anything more than casual and don't expect "love at first sight." At least now she'll know who you are. The next time you talk with her, you both will feel more comfortable and it might be time to ask her out.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Asher Isbrucker