DR. WALLACE: My mother and father work for the same steel company. My dad works from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. five days a week, while my mother works from 3 p.m. to 11 p.m. This means that I spend more time with my father than I do with my mother. This also means that my father and I have bonded more than my mother and I, which has caused some friction between us.

My problem is that my mom has become very authoritarian and hardly allows me to speak to her. On the weekends, my dad plays golf, so that leaves me home alone with my mom and she has become very negative most of the time. For example, if I want to go to the mall with my girlfriends, she usually says no. And when I ask her why not, she says because I said so, or I said the answer is No unless your father overrules me again. And she already knows that he won't be home in time to change her decision and allow me to go and spend time with my friends.

It really isn't fun to not have any freedom and to hear her say, Because I'm the boss, or Because I said so. I can't really complain to my dad because that would only cause a big fight between my parents with me in the middle and I don?t want to do that.

Do you think these are good answers when I ask why my request is being denied? - Nameless, Crown Point, Ind.

NAMELESS: When a teen asks why a request has been denied, wise parents explain why the answer is no — carefully and lovingly, answering the teen's questions while still holding their ground. Parents have the final say when it comes to their children, but saying, because I said so, is an unwise response.

UNCONDITIONAL LOVE IS EVERLASTING

DR. WALLACE: I'm 18 and have just had a baby. The guy I was going with decided to break up with me two days before the baby was born. HeCs 25 and a very kind person. I still love him and care for him a lot. The problem is that he's scared to let his emotions go because he was hurt by another girl before me.

He says that we'd never make it together, but I think we can if he'd give it a try. I know he still cares for me, but he's scared that I'm going to hurt him. I don't want to hurt him in any way. All I want to do is love him in every possible way. I need him.

We had been going together the last six months of my pregnancy, and now this happened. Now he's going out with another girl. I don't know what to do. Will you please help me? He is not the baby's father. — Shelly, Santa Fe, N.M.

SHELLY: Your prime responsibility is the safety and welfare of your precious baby. The baby's biological father is obligated to give you financial support. If he's not doing so, please, for your baby?s sake, seek legal assistance.

Focus on being a loving mother and give up any thought of going with this man again. He didn't really love you!

Having a baby requires dedication and responsibility. This child's welfare is now your prime focus, and if you put your all into it, you will be an excellent mother.

In time, you will fall in love with Mr. Right, who will be not just a loving husband, but also a loving father to your child. A marriage born with unconditional love is everlasting. Your day will come.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Quinn Dombrowski