Dear Family Coach: My 12-year-old son still likes sleeping with a small security blanket, stuffed animals and a dream light. At what point will he outgrow such things? Or do we need to wean him off them? — Uneasy Dad

Dear Uneasy: I grew up with a Snoopy doll that acted as my security blanket. He followed me to camp, and even to college. My mother used to joke I would have to give him up or I'd never get married. Guess what happened. The day I got married, Snoopy sat on my bed waiting for me to come home with my husband. Somehow, my beloved stuffed animal didn't prevent me from accomplishing anything I set out to do.

You don't have to worry about weaning your son off his little lovey and night light. They are harmless. In fact, they can be quite reassuring in tough times. I cried more than a few tears to Snoopy, and he never judged me. He never gave up on me or moved on to other friends either. He was a faithful pal who was with me through every milestone in my life.

Let your son enjoy his special nighttime friends. If he decides he doesn't need his blanket and animals anymore, he will push them to the side in his own time.

Dear Family Coach: My 9-year-old is a faker and addicted to the nurse's office. He complains to his teachers and the lunch monitor a few times a week that something is bothering him. Sometimes they let him see the nurse, and other times they don't. How can I help him stop seeking attention by pretending to be sick? — Faker's Mom

Dear Mom: To help your son avoid the nurse's office, it's vital to understand the underlying reason for his visits. There are several likely possibilities for his incessant complaints. He is avoiding an undesirable task, having anxiety or looking for some needed individual attention.

I would start by asking the teacher to keep track of what was occurring immediately before he asked to see the nurse. Find out whether there is a pattern. If one exists, address the issue directly with the help of the guidance counselor (for social issues) or a tutor (for academic support). Create a policy, too, that states he should not be allowed to leave a lesson until it is finished unless he is having an emergency. This should discourage him from using the nurse's office as an escape.

Also, talk to him about his specific complaints. Some children feel real minor aches and pains, but due to anxiety those minor issues grow in their minds to massive problems. For example, a slight stomachache could be terminal in his mind. This is unlikely but important to assess. If this is the case, I'd recommend the help of a counselor to work through the anxiety.

The last possibility is that your son is struggling emotionally and looking for more personal interaction with a grown-up. If this seems likely, try to help him find alternative ways to get what he is craving. Make a deal with him that if he can avoid the nurse's office for a week, you will reward him with a special activity. If you think it's impossible for him to go an entire week without a visit, then challenge him to make it three days, or even two.

Dr. Catherine Pearlman, the founder of The Family Coach, LLC, advises parents on all matters of child rearing. To write to Dr. Pearlman, send her an email at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Catherine Pearlman and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.