Soul Mate? I Think Not!

By Cheryl Lavin

September 22, 2018 4 min read

Call me crazy, but it seems that if her kids hate you and she lies and cheats and you can't get along, she's not your soul mate. But I digress ...

Cameron met Ann Marie online. At the time, he had been divorced for four years after 21 years of marriage and had just ended another relationship.

"To say I enjoyed dating would be an understatement. I liked meeting different women and would date two or three at the same time."

But that all changed with Ann Marie. "She was so refreshing, genuine and full of life. It was contagious."

But after five weeks of dating, she broke up with him. Then, a few weeks later, her dog passed away and she called him.

"I came right over, and we buried her dog in the garden and planted some flowers over him. That was the beginning of the most fantastic 18 months of my life. I had met my soul mate. I thought I knew what love was. Not to sound too corny, but she completed me. I laughed at that line in 'Jerry Maguire,' but with Ann Marie, it made sense."

After those fantastic 18 months, they were talking about living together and maybe getting married, but they had a fight.

"It was one of those fights that start out small over something stupid and then escalate. It was my fault. We should have been one of those old couples who walk down the street holding hands, but instead we broke up."

The fight started at a wedding. They'd both been drinking. They were on the dance floor. Ann Marie told Cameron to stay there with his friends while she went back to the bar.

"I took it as her telling me what to do. It simmered until we got back to our room and then all hell broke loose. Everything she had been keeping inside came pouring out, and not in a nice way. We left early the next morning and didn't talk for the two-hour ride home. I came back later that day to apologize, but the damage had been done.

"We went to dinner later that week to talk and it was very emotional. One of our big problems was my relationship, or lack thereof, with her children. She has four grown kids. Their father left them when the youngest was just a year old, so they're very close. Her two other marriages each ended in under two years.

"Her kids hated both of those men, too. They've told her point-blank that they'll never be happy with her dating anyone. They never warmed up to me, even though they said they'd never seen her happier or better taken care of."

That dinner started a period of breaking up and getting back together. Cameron started seeing a counselor. He lost 40 pounds and was an emotional wreck. He told Ann Marie he loved her and wanted to be with her. She said she felt the same. Then he found out she was back on a dating website.

"We broke up again. I took her back again. This happened a few more times. I still love and miss her very much."

Got a problem? Send it, along with your questions and rants, to [email protected] And check out my e-bookS, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front" and "I'll Call You. Not."

Photo credit: at Pixabay

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