Facebook does a lot of great things. It reunites families, reestablishes friendships and even aids revolutions. But it does some pretty funky stuff as well. Messing around with our elections comes to mind.
Kathy says that "of all things," never in a million years did she think she'd write to me about her love life: "You see, I'm usually a very responsible person. I never do anything out of the ordinary. Some might say I'm boring. I've been married for 25 years. I have three kids and a dog. My family was my entire life. Then two years ago I found Facebook and my life changed."
Kathy became "friends" with Bo, whom she'd barely known in high school. "We knew a lot of the same people and had a lot of same memories and we were both in unhappy marriages," she said. They texted and chatted every chance they got.
She continued: "The beginning was magical. I'd forgotten how much fun it was getting to know someone. I told him secrets that I'd never told anybody. I wrote things I would never have had the courage to say out loud.
"I'd wake up early in the morning because I couldn't wait to see what he'd written on my wall or what love letters he'd sent while I was sleeping. We were in love and I loved being in love with him. My world slowly went from all about my family to all about him. I pretty much ignored them. All my thoughts were about him. He told me everything I wanted to hear and I believed every word. I had found my soul mate."
During all this time, Kathy and Bo never met in person. They lived 1,000 miles apart. They made plans a few times, but something always happened and Bo had to cancel. But that didn't stop them from planning to spend their lives together.
She says: "We were going to divorce our spouses and then marry and live happily ever after. He was going to move out around the first of the year and I was going to leave when my youngest left for college in the fall. He asked me for my ring size. We talked about where to go on our honeymoon. We discussed where we would live. Last Christmas, I boxed up all the decorations I wanted to bring with me so when I left I wouldn't have to go through it again."
And then something happened, but Kathy isn't quite sure what. What she does know is that Bo started flirting with girls on Facebook. "I could see everything he said," she says. He told her he was depressed. He hated his job. His wife had cancer.
And then his dog passed away.
And then the texts stopped. He stopped telling Kathy he loved her. He became distant. She'd write to him, and he'd ignore her.
"I didn't know what to think," she says. "He told me I had to be more understanding. Ha! It took me eight months, but now I understand perfectly well. I was a fool for falling for all his lies.
"Now that I'm back to being my normal boring self, my life is very peaceful. I love not having to worry about things and I can honestly say I won't be fooled again. I hope."
Have you been played for a fool? Send your tale, along with your questions, problems and rants to [email protected] And check out my e-books, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front" and "I'll Call You. Not."