Dear Cheryl: Susan and I only dated twice, but we had a child together. She lived with me for a year after our son was born. I wanted to marry her, but she said she wasn't happy.

She went back to live with her mom, 20 miles away, and took our son with her. I have been dating around for a couple of years now. I finally found a lady who has a college degree, and her parents and grandparents on both sides never divorced, unlike Susan's elders. My new girlfriend, who I met three months ago, is really sweet and has a good job. But I really want to live with my son.

Susan wants to get back with me. She had a relationship with a man she met after she moved back with her mother, but it's over.

What do you think? I'm a good provider, and I own my own home and have a good job. I'm very troubled at 29. — Help!

Dear Help: Does Susan want to get back with you because she's tired of living with her mother and she just broke up with her boyfriend? Or does she have real feelings for you?

I'd hate for her to move back in and then move out again. It's not fair to your son. He shouldn't be carted around from one home to another because Susan doesn't know what she wants.

Twenty miles isn't that long a distance. You, Susan and your son should spend time together before you decide to let her move in. And don't make another baby in the meantime.

Dear Cheryl: My husband asked if I wanted to attend a church function with him, and it completely slipped my mind that I would be babysitting our granddaughter at the time of the event. The function was for adults only, so he went himself. I learned later that he picked up a female co-worker and drove her to the function. (She's not married, but she lives with a man and also dates other men.) I became very upset when I found out. My husband said it was OK because the function was at church and he had no bad intentions.

When I asked him why he drove her since she has her own car, he said the man who arranged the function asked him to drive her. I'm offended. I asked him to discuss this situation with a Christian man with whom he works. The man said we both have a point. I occasionally think about the situation and get angry. My husband is a difficult man to discuss problems with; he can only see his side. I would like to confront him with a third, neutral party, but I know he wouldn't be willing to do that. Am I wrong to feel offended? — Steaming Grammy

Dear Steaming Grammy: Maybe your husband should have told you that he was picking up his co-worker when he left the house. But maybe it meant so little to him that it wasn't worth discussing. In any case, if this is truly the issue, just let it go.

But, if there are other things bothering you, deal with them before they fester. There are Christian marriage guides that your husband may be willing to read with you. Or perhaps there is a minister he respects who could counsel you.

Got a problem? Send it, along with your questions and rants to [email protected]. And check out my e-book, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front."