Q: I live in Hong Kong and have a 10-year-old daughter, who is in fifth grade. Her problem has been annoying me for more than a year. She is very slow in doing homework. She thinks back and forth before answering every question. She writes two words and then erases them for perfect handwriting. It takes her two hours to finish three questions. I beat her, shout at her and scold her, but it's no use. I am afraid I will totally lose my temper. Could you suggest why she is like this and what I could do about it?

A: I'm not sure what your daughter's problem is, but I can assure you that beating her and shouting at her will not help you or her to solve her problem. In our country, beating her would be considered abuse, but perhaps I have a cultural misinterpretation here. You should contact either your school or a private psychologist as soon as possible. The psychologist can conduct a comprehensive evaluation and help to determine your daughter's problems. Your daughter's teacher can help direct you to the right person for help. You may also want to look at my website, at http:///www.sylviarimm.com, for articles that can help you understand attention problems and perfectionism. Please get some help immediately.

While you are searching for help, let me suggest some possible issues and solutions. Perfectionism may be part of your daughter's problem. Perfectionists are so fearful of making mistakes that they erase too much for fear that they are wrong and ponder for long periods of time because of their uncertainty.

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder could also be a problem for your daughter. She may be very distracted by inner thoughts or other surroundings and find it difficult to concentrate on her work.

Your daughter could also have either a reading (dyslexia) or a writing (dysgraphia) disability and be struggling as a result.

I can understand how frustrated you must feel, but none of these problems will be solved by either scolding or hitting. Your daughter, no doubt, feels frightened and paralyzed when it comes to doing her work. You can try giving her small rewards for completing her work or suggest she try to beat a timer. You can offer to play a fun game with her after her work is done. These more positive approaches will at least ease her anxiety related to her work. If there are serious underlying issues, even the positives will not motivate her to accomplish much, but at least you can share that information with the evaluating psychologist when she is being diagnosed.

Dr. Sylvia B. Rimm is the director of the Family Achievement Clinic in Cleveland, a clinical professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, and the author of many books on parenting. More information on raising kids is available at www.sylviarimm.com. Please send questions to: Sylvia B. Rimm on Raising Kids, P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI 53094 or [email protected]. To read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.