Please pass the schadenfreude.

How sweet it is. Let me count the ways.

On this side of the Civil War, we're reveling in the summery rose garden of President Donald Trump's utterly failed few days. We hope to see many more.

Schadenfreude is a German word for pleasure at another's pain. True to his Teutonic roots, Trump is a master. Never have so many people been so insulted by one American president.

This time, the tables turned. After all the gloating before the Tulsa, Oklahoma, campaign rally, saying he never sees empty seats, America saw a blue sea of them. How humiliating. Thanks, Tulsa.

Thanks to John Bolton, too. It takes a knave to fell a rogue.

First, Trump's racist diatribe to cheering white people was his stock in trade. He missed a chance to extol the Trail of Tears, the forced march of Native American tribes to Oklahoma ordered by his favorite president, Andrew Jackson. "The General" was a fierce Southern slaveholder. (Outside the White House, protestors stormed Jackson's equestrian statue late Monday.)

But the main event was thousands of empty seats, giving the lie to trumpeting boasts. We know Trump cares deeply about crowd size from the first day, when the National Mall was half-empty for his "American carnage" inauguration. Why would anyone want to miss that?

That drove Trump to fits of rage on Air Force One. How delightful.

The graduating class of West Point cadets was a coerced audience, forced to listen to his bombast. They forgot to cheer when Trump announced his (74th) birthday was the next day. He sure looked aged, tip-toeing down a ramp.

The latest polls are a pleasure. Trump, falling behind Joe Biden, is slipping in small steps with his base. He rarely wins new supporters.

If you add the Supreme Court upholding President Barack Obama's "Dreamers" program for children of immigrants — a personal blow to Trump — then perhaps summer will bring better days.

Yet Biden is shy of hand-to-hand political combat, coming from cushy little Delaware. Gumption is not his strong suit. Free advice to Joe: Defend the Post Office from Trump's starvation siege. To win the election, Trump would surely shut down voting by mail the hard way.

Bolton's explosive book, "The Room Where It Happened," released Tuesday, will further enrage the president. Trump uncaged isn't a good look while the nation reels from a pandemic, an economic crisis and protests for racial justice. All in a single spring, on his watch, a perfect storm came.

As Trump's former national security adviser, Bolton was disgusted with the amateur hour in the Oval Office.

In an unsparing story, the author confirms our worst fears. Trump is semiliterate on global affairs. His impeachable offense was real: trying to tie an election favor to defense aid for Ukraine. Bolton says Trump tried to help his election chances in dealings with China.

Congress and the American people needed to know this six months ago, during impeachment proceedings. If Bolton cared about the country, he would have testified, as his aide Fiona Hill did.

One contest Trump may win this year: worst American president in the pantheon, my father observed.

Last week, I wrote on Confederate statues in the Capitol, which Trump calls precious pieces of "heritage."

Clearly, we have a virulent Confederate made of many pounds of flesh — here in the White House. Trump and old Jefferson Davis, vainglorious leader of the Confederacy, are a perfect pair in history's dungeon.

In four years, Davis caused no end of grief and hatred, tearing us apart over slavery. He never repented.

Over the same span, Trump conducted a civil war — small "c" — inciting flames of white male supremacy against women, immigrants and people of color. He waged wars of words against the press, Congress, the military and government experts in science and spycraft.

In his first inaugural address, President Abraham Lincoln reached out to Southern states, trying to avert the Civil War: "We are not enemies, but friends." Kind words across a divide.

Imagine: an election taking us back to the right side of history.

Jamie Stiehm can be reached at JamieStiehm.com. To read her weekly column and find out more about Creators Syndicate columnists and cartoonists, please visit creators.com.

Photo credit: Tama66 at Pixabay