Q: I've hired three lawyers to help settle my wife's estate, and I've paid and fired all of them after finding them unqualified and uninformed. A common response from these experts about estate matters was "I'll get back to you on that." And they billed me between $250 and $300 an hour.

How can I find a qualified estate lawyer?

A: Finding a knowledgeable lawyer who charges a reasonable fee is challenging. Many lawyers take too long to do the job, cost too much or simply don't have experience with estate planning. Also, hourly rates don't prompt them to do things quickly.

Lawyers have access to expensive research websites and believe that they can handle any legal problem with those resources. However, as clients, we want a specialized lawyer in order to have the best decisions made for us.

The key to hiring a lawyer is finding one with experience in their specialty who will offer options you wouldn't otherwise consider. No lawyer is a specialist in all legal matters.

To find one, ask around. You can consult bank officers, stockbrokers, your state bar association website and even insurance agents who have called to finalize the estate. Then, call the attorney and ask for a complimentary appointment to discuss your wishes. Have clear goals in mind. The lawyer should be helpful, have a style that works for you, offer a flat fee and have an acceptable timeline for completing your paperwork.

Finding a good lawyer is difficult and time-consuming but well worth the effort. — Doug

MODERN COMMUNICATION

Q: I recently wrote a letter to my grandson for his birthday, only to find out that he couldn't understand it because I wrote in cursive! Apparently, many schools no longer teach students how to write in cursive and my grandson uses a computer for many school activities. I don't think I've ever received a handwritten letter from him.

What do you think about how this basic knowledge is disappearing?

A: Change always has its drawbacks. There are absolutely many advantages to technological advancements, but it's easy to feel left behind. Many seniors either don't know how to use a computer or can't use one due to arthritis, and you may feel isolated and disconnected because of it.

Students are able to take more notes on a computer in a certain amount of time than they are by handwriting them, as typing is quicker. However, many studies have shown that students retain information better when they handwrite their notes.

A handwritten letter or thank-you note comes across as much more intimate than an email, so there is a nuance that is lost with this transition. Receiving mail can be especially beneficial for seniors, as it bolsters their connection with the outside world.

Continue writing to your grandson, as he may come to appreciate the art more and see the letters as mementos. Maybe you can suggest to his parents that he write the occasional letter to you! — Emma, Doug's granddaughter

Doug Mayberry makes the most of life in a Southern California retirement community. Contact him at [email protected]. Emma, Doug's granddaughter, helps write this column. To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.