Looking for Love

By Doug Mayberry

March 5, 2018 4 min read

Q: After nearly three years of widowhood and attending our senior center community activities, church events and other social outings, I still haven't found a new partner.

My friends have suggested that I've been trying too hard, and that I might be able to find the right man if only I relax. I'm healthy and financially stable, so I don't need a partner, but I am lonely and want to make a new connection.

What can I do next?

A: Finding a new partner isn't easy, especially when you had a wonderful previous relationship. It's challenging to find a healthy and happy man that you're compatible with who is also looking for love.

You're on the right path by participating in group activities. However, you should ask yourself whether you're meeting any new people, especially men. Don't limit your social opportunities by choosing the wrong activities.

Look into groups with many male members (one easy suggestion is to look for something sports related). You can also attend afternoon tea dances and civic clubs, like those put on by Rotary International and Kiwanis International.

If you still find yourself without any potential suitors, you can join organized dating events or online dating services. These will help you meet a larger variety of people while filtering out those who already have paired up.

You're not the only one looking for love, so be patient. Sometimes you have to cast a wide net to find the right partner. No matter what else, stay positive! — Doug

CONTINGENCY PLANNING

Q: I have a friend who had a heart attack while shopping alone at a busy mall. Luckily, security guards were close by and able to call for help. She was rushed to the emergency room and is successfully recuperating.

However, she saw many of the difficulties with being rushed to the emergency room. The hospital registration desk was unable to make contact with her family and friends without her help. She had her Medicare card and license in her wallet but no other contact information.

What do you recommend keeping in our wallets in case of an emergency hospitalization?

A: Excellent question. This is a concern that's very easy to overlook until it happens to you.

We should all carry a card listing emergency information: next of kin; their phone number(s) and address(es); primary doctor's phone number; insurance information; and any other useful data. You might want to include your landlord's name and address, or information for a reliable family member who always responds promptly to phone calls.

When you're undergoing an emergency, logistics are the last thing you want to worry about. Come up with a plan that will remove any additional stresses from these kinds of incidents. Try to have this information immediately available.

Additionally, make copies of this information for your family, friends or neighbors. Help them help you! They will be able to respond more quickly if they already have the basics outlined.

As we all know, time is critical in emergency situations. The sooner that doctors and the hospital learn what your medical wishes are, the more likely you are to receive the treatment that will help you recover. — Emma, Doug's granddaughter

Doug Mayberry makes the most of life in a Southern California retirement community. Contact him at [email protected] Emma, Doug's granddaughter, helps write this column. To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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