Opinion> Lenore Skenazy> A Few Commandments The Vatican Missed

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A Few Commandments the Vatican Missed

Now that the Vatican has issued its 10 Commandments for Drivers — which, with any luck, you weren't reading on your BlackBerry while dialing your mother while switching lanes while gesturing obscenely out the window at the granny only going 70 — it seemed like a good idea to see if there were any more commandments out there.

After all, other religions, and individuals, like commandment-issuing, too. Who doesn't? Here's a smattering:

11: Thou Shalt Not Give Wrong Directions:

Pleeeeease, begged the associate director of the National Jewish Outreach Program, Rabbi Yitzchak Rosenbaum: "If someone asks you for directions and you don't know where it is, say, 'I don't know.'" Fast ! No hemming, no hawing, no, "I think it may be … wait, no maybe … " The Talmud states: "Thou shalt not put a stumbling block in front of a blind man" — because, obviously, this would not serve the blind guy well. Bad directions are stumbling blocks for the rest of us.

12: Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor's Hummer:

"Air pollution and carbon emissions impact God's creations negatively," said the director of Eco-Justice Programs at the National Council of Churches, Cassandra Carmichael. The more polluting your vehicle, the more polluted your soul, she said (pretty much). And her organization represents 100,000 churches.

13: Thou Shalt Quit Blabbering Through Thine Bumper Stickers:

"A single bumper sticker is OK, but why must someone's entire worldview be plastered on their car's rear end?" asked Judy Gruen, author of "The Women's Daily Irony Supplement." "The 'Kill Your TV' sticker already gives me the agenda.

But then they'll also have 'Another vegan for peace' and 'Perform random acts of kindness.' Why random? Can't they plan ahead?" Especially since they're saving so much time not watching TV?

14: Thou Shalt Wear Thy Safety Belt:

This is not just me, a Jewish mother, speaking. This is Josef Carmel, a Jewish rabbi , speaking — from Jerusalem, no less, where he answers religious questions at www.eretzhemdah.org. "Wearing a belt is not only an obligation, but a mitzvah ," he said — a good deed, "because everyone is supposed to do everything to keep himself and his family alive." That should change some wild teens' behavior, right? "Buckle up, punk! It's a mitzvah!"

15: Thou Shalt Not Be Late to the Carpool:

It is forbidden to waste someone's time, said Rabbi Rosenbaum. That's because, unlike money, time is something you can never pay a person back.

16: Text Not:

The fact that this isn't illegal while driving is a sin.

17: Thou Shalt Give Pedestrians the Right of Way In the Crosswalk:

It says so right in the Bible: "Crosswalks are for pedestrians, o ye jerks! Let the two-legged go first or ye shall spend eternity in a fiery crosswalk being run over by a cabbie cackling on his cell phone."

At least, I think that's what it says.

Anyway, it should. And that's the god's honest truth.

Lenore Skenazy is a contributing editor at the New York Sun. To find out more about Lenore Skenazy (lenore@lenoretown.com), and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.