Tackling Issues One at a Time Q: I have two important issues I need resolved. One is that my husband complains I am overspending. The other is that I dislike our new daughter-in-law. I complain repetitively to my husband about how unhappy I am. He understands, but tells me that …Read more. Resolutions 2014! Q: As the year comes to an end, my wife is asking me when I am going to make my list of New Year's resolutions. She always makes one, and in most years, gets it done. I am a hit-and-miss resolution maker, but mostly miss! I'm in my 70s and realizing …Read more. Holiday Hardships Q: Holidays and birthdays are not my favorites because I lost my wife nearly three years ago. My son and daughter-in-law live out of state and can only visit during the summer months. I am contented and keep myself busy through most of the year; …Read more. Clear the Holiday Air! Q: As we do every year in our family, we are planning our big holiday. The process begins when the designated host sets the date, time, place and assigns who brings what food. However, a major problem has occurred. One of our sons' employers went …Read more.more articles
Q: I am one of five adult family members. Our 63-year-old brother is the youngest. Over the last five years, we have drifted apart for what my sisters and I believe to be trivial issues. And they have resulted in serious disputes among us.
We all live within 300 miles of each other. In order to shore up our relationships and bring peace and joy back to our family, my sisters and I are giving serious thought to hosting a family reunion in July. Do you think it is worth our time and effort to try to patch up our differences?
A: Yes, families often have arguments that lead to disgruntlement, which will fester on until you face reality.
By loving, caring, compromising, teaching younger family members to share each other's ups and downs, offering encouragement, taking time to appreciate the value of families and trusting, among other things, are what families are all about. Acknowledging and accepting our differences in a committed support group, like what you have, is something we all need and want. Where else are these blessings available?
There is one sure way to find out if your family will overcome its unhappiness. Send out your family reunion invitations. Ask for written acceptance, including a deadline, and also detail the costs of food and entertainment. The responses you receive, or lack there of, will answer your question.
In some cases, lack of honest communication within families and an unwillingness to face the facts are why families suffer.
Q: My husband and I are both in our late 60s and working. We are considering our retirement plans. Fortunately, we have the financial capability to choose from options.
What have you learned that could be helpful?
A: The No. 1 issue is your health. Regardless of age, many of us come face to face with its deterioration. Heredity, lifestyle habits, choice of commitments, attitude, socialization and other factors govern our future. Some we cannot control.
Realizing what will happen based on what we do and how we react to events governs our lives. We try to moderate the worst possible outcomes.
Surprisingly, not only health, but accidents, divorce, boredom, loss of assets, nature's actions and other unexpected events occur, which require us to bite that bullet.
Another high priority worth discussing is your future housing plans. Do you prefer to live where you are, to move closer to your family, want to change your lifestyle and move to an active retirement communalist, or something else?
Seniors, choose to remain as independent as possible and maintain control. Lean minimally on families and friends for support. Think about your newfound freedom and what will make you happiest. Good weather will also play an important factor in your decision. You are wise to follow the Scout Motto: "Be Prepared!"
Doug Mayberry makes the most of life in a Southern California Retirement community. Contact him at email@example.com. To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
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