My Boyfriend Does One Thing That Makes Me Cringe

By Dr. Robert Wallace

October 17, 2025 5 min read

DR. WALLACE: I've had a steady boyfriend since last May, toward the end of the last school year. We've grown closer and closer, and I have no doubt we're in love with each other.

We are both seniors in high school right now. One of the things we have in common is our love for basketball, as he plays on the boys varsity basketball team and I play on the girls varsity basketball team, and we're both pretty successful players. He's never done anything to cause me to feel he's not trustworthy, and he treats me really well, but he does have one habit that kind of drives me crazy. He's a serial hugger! He absolutely comes in for a big hug with every girl that's a friend of his, even a casual one, and he even does the "bro" hug with all his guy friends. What I'm referring to is when they shake hands, kind of lock thumbs and then lean in, make light contact and pat each other on the back. To me, it kind of looks awkward, but he doesn't think twice about doing it all day, every day! And I should mention that with all the girls, there is no "bro hug," but instead a full-frontal, deep, "body-on-body" hug!

Part of me has been wanting to say something to him about this, but things are going so well in our relationship that I don't want to create friction or drama as none has ever arisen between the two of us ever before. Besides, I kind of know deep down it's not really a big deal, but for some reason, it does irritate me a little. Should I speak up, or continue to hold my tongue? — I'd Prefer Him to Hug Less, via email

I'D PREFER HIM TO HUG LESS: To me, you answered your own question within the context of your letter when you mentioned that you know it's really no big deal. You also mentioned that he hasn't done anything to cause you to think that he's not trustworthy, plus he treats you extremely well.

Many girls your age would absolutely love to be in a relationship like the one you describe, so my advice is to completely overlook your reflexive distaste of his penchant for hugging every single friend he has! There are a lot of worse things he could be doing, so the next time you want to roll your eyes at the sight of him hugging someone, take a couple of deep breaths, exhale slowly, smile and do your best to let it go entirely! Focus on how much you care about all the great qualities he brings to your relationship and how much the two of you truly care for each other.

HE DOESN'T THINK MIXING THESE SUBSTANCES IS ANY BIG DEAL

DR. WALLACE: Please settle an argument my boyfriend and I always have. We both recently turned 21, and for weeks I've warned him not to mix alcohol with cannabis. He says it's no big deal since alcohol leaves his system within a matter of hours anyhow.

I feel it's never good to mix two substances that can impair a person, but maybe I'm just a chronic worrier? — He Says It's No Big Deal, via email

HE SAYS IT'S NO BIG DEAL: Most people are aware that alcohol should not be mixed with prescription medication, particularly antibiotics, and other substances. But your question is an interesting one given the unique properties of cannabis.

It's more of a gray area when it comes to the effects of using alcohol and cannabis simultaneously. Each person's cellular biology is different, and therefore the effects upon any given individual can be unpredictable when consuming cannabis and alcohol at the same time, or within a short window of time of each other.

Doing this is what is commonly known as "cross-fading," but one substance can affect and even amplify the effects of the other, which at times can lead to a stronger overall intoxication. It's true that alcohol does leave the system within a matter of several hours, but the effects of cannabis and THC remain in the human body for much longer periods of time.

I side with your logic of being concerned about avoiding mixing any intoxicating or mind-altering substances.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

Photo credit: Alex Gallegos at Unsplash

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