Everyday Cheapskate

Dear Mary: I am the parent of a 25-year-old man, who is moving home with few possessions and an unbelievable amount of debt. My husband and I don't know how to guide or support him through this period. We do not plan to assist him outright with money, but what steps should we take so we know he is heading in the right direction financially? -- Laura P., e-mail

Dear Laura: I suggest you create a list of house rules that, if he moves back, he must follow. Failure to do so means he must leave.

Rule 1: He must go through credit counseling with a reputable organization (find the closest one to you at www.nfcc.org) that offers a debt-management program.

Rule 2: He has to enroll in that debt-management program.

Rule 3: No credit cards, no debit card. One ATM card only.

Rule 4: All adult children must pay room and board.

These four rules will force him to live a cash lifestyle and get him onto a debt-repayment path that is being monitored and managed by someone other than his parents. Finally, I would make it very clear that you are not going to bail him out with any loans, advances or other forms of aid. As a mom, I know this is going to be harder for you than for him to stick to the house rules. But that will be the key to success.

Dear Mary: In your column "Important Papers To Grab in a Disaster," you mentioned readers should invest in fireproof and heatproof safes for their important documents.

As a former firefighter, I wanted your readers to know that your safe should be kept on the lowest level of your house. First, heat rises, so the safe will be in the coolest part of the fire. Second, if the safe is on a higher floor that collapses, damage could be done to the contents in the fall.

Also, make sure your safe is equipped to keep interior temperatures that will protect its contents. The unit I own will keep temperatures lower than 350 degrees, which will protect paper documents, but not home inventory videotapes. -- Chad L., e-mail

Dear Chad: Thanks for the specific information on home safes. Readers can find safes at home improvement centers, as well as office supply stores. By the way, one reader wrote to say that her financial situation does not allow her to purchase a safe at this time, so she keeps her important papers in a zip-lock freezer bag and stores it in the freezer. She was told that the inside of a freezer nearly always survives a house fire.

Do you have a question for Mary? E-mail her at mary@everydaycheapskate.com or write to Everyday Cheapskate, P.O. Box 2135, Paramount, CA 90723. Mary Hunt is the founder of www.DebtProofLiving.com and author of 17 books, including "Debt-Proof Living." To find out more about Mary and read her past columns, please visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.
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