DR. WALLACE: A friend of mine recently introduced me to the activity of volunteering time to help out charitable organizations in our area. These locations are always looking for monetary donations, donations of goods and supplies, and also volunteer work.

I'd like to be able to do more than I am currently able to do, because now that my eyes have been opened to what goes on in some other parts of the city I live in, I truly have compassion for a lot of people who have many more challenges than I do in their lives.

As a teenager in high school, I have limited time to spend doing this volunteer work, even though I find it tremendously satisfying. Unfortunately I don't have any financial resources either, so donating my time when I am able appears to be the current limit of what I can do.

I'm writing to you because I have a nagging feeling that I'm missing out on ways I could be doing even more than I am presently doing in this regard. — I'm Truly Interested in Helping Further, via email

I'M TRULY INTERESTED IN HELPING FURTHER: Congratulations on accompanying your friend to do some volunteer work that you find satisfying and enriching. Our society as a whole benefits tremendously when you and other likeminded individuals donate time, energy and resources to help others in need.

My suggestion to you is not to forgo important parts of your life, such as your schoolwork and your academic goals, in order to volunteer more with your personal time. Do your best to do physical volunteer work in line with what you have been able to accomplish so far, even though you feel like you'd like to be there more often in person. You'll still be tremendously satisfied when you have the time to give, and your personal sense of gratification will indeed be activated as it has before.

The area I feel you may be able to assist with further would be in the publicity you can spread in your personal life. As you interact with various other people of all ages that you speak to on a regular or semi-regular basis, simply speak about what you've learned, why you enjoy it and how you see it making a difference. This may similarly influence others to take steps of their own. You yourself were introduced to this genre by a friend, so you can similarly become a force multiplier by inviting friends, relatives and acquaintances of yours to go with you on future visits to donate your time when you are available.

You can also spend some of your time to increase awareness and perhaps drum up some fundraising of capital or physical resources that may be helpful to the specific charity you are involved with. Think creatively and out of the box on how you could accomplish this, and I trust you'll find success in bringing at least a few others to experience the joy of personal time and resources well spent.

MY FRIEND TELLS OTHERS TOO MUCH ABOUT OUR FAMILY'S LIVES

DR. WALLACE: I have a girlfriend who is my best friend, and we are both intermediate school students in the eighth grade. She comes from a single-parent family, as she and her brother are being raised by her mother. Her father is not in her life, apparently lives on the other side of the country and has no contact with her family.

Therefore, she spends a lot of time at our house after school and even on the weekends sometimes because her mom works a lot since she has two jobs. Her brother spends time at a neighbor's house that has a boy his age. I really like my friend, and we get along great except for one thing that bothers me.

Because she knows so much about our family, sometimes she'll talk to other kids at school, particularly some girls that I know, about the work they do or even things I feel are a bit too personal to be telling other kids at school. There's nothing terrible about what she talks about, but it just seems to me to be too personal.

I know she's experiencing a much tougher upbringing than I am, so I haven't wanted to say anything to her for a while now. But recently she started talking to other kids at school about my mother's shopping habits, what types of meals my father eats, and who he eats them with when he's away from home on business.

Should I say anything to her, or am I being just too sensitive about this? — She Talks a Lot About Our Family, via email

SHE TALKS A LOT ABOUT OUR FAMILY: I can understand where you're coming from and definitely realize why you are experiencing hesitation in saying anything directly to her. However, I do feel there's room for you to carefully explain to her that certain things she hears or sees while spending time over at your house are a bit personal and should be held close within the family for the most part.

I feel a good way to do this would be to explain to her that she is so close to your family that she's almost like another sister because she spends so much time with you and your family on a regular basis. Tell her this is very special and you're glad she is the one who gets to spend so much time with you and your family but that you feel certain "family matters" sometimes are best kept within the family, similar to what most other families do.

Give her a big hug as you explain this to her, smile, and let her know that you're simply saying this as a positive thing to her, not a negative one. Hopefully this will get the point across and she will also feel comfortable and happy to be considered so close to all of you that she's virtually like an extra family member.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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