DR. WALLACE: I'm 20 and the guy I'm dating is 22. He's a great guy and I really care for him a lot. He has a super sense of humor and he's a lot of fun to be with. The only concern I have is that he's a former alcoholic. He attended a special clinic and says he is totally cured. He says he hasn't touched alcohol in over a year, but I read somewhere that alcoholism can't be cured. Please tell me the true facts about this. — Kichica, Gary, Ind.

KICHICA: An alcoholic can live an alcohol-free life, but there is no "cure," as such, for alcoholism. This means that the recovering alcoholic can never relax his guard and assume that, because he is "cured," a drink or two will do him no harm. That is just not true. One drink could reactivate the addiction. Alcohol will always have this power over him.

One of the best organizations to help keep an ex-drinker free of alcohol is Alcoholics Anonymous. It's a wonderful organization. Ask your friend if he's a member of AA. If not, suggest that he join this very helpful organization. Tell him that he should check the white pages of the local phone book for the nearest chapter.

GOOD FRIENDSHIPS SHOULD LAST A LIFETIME

DR. WALLACE: My older brother started dating a girl and their relationship became serious. She and I became very good friends. Then for no apparent reason, my brother broke up with her. Needless to say, she was crushed, but we remained close friends.

It took her a really long time to get over the breakup, but I did all I could to cheer her up. Finally, I fixed her up with my boyfriend's older brother. Before I knew what was happening, they were dating steadily and a few months later they were engaged. Now, the more she is involved with this guy, the less time she spends with me and we hardly do anything together any more. If we do, she has very little time and we are no longer close at all. When she got engaged, she didn't even tell me. I heard it from my boyfriend.

I'm aware that her life is changing and she has things to do with her boyfriend, but I also do with my boyfriend, but it doesn't mean that our friendship should end. I thought good friends were supposed to be happy when they share with each other and that they don't ignore you when they make changes in their lives. I can't think of anything that I've done to destroy our friendship and I can't even bring myself to congratulate her

Do you think that I'm being too sensitive, or that my feelings are wrong? I really thought that, being best friends, we would soon be planning the wedding together. What do you think about this? - Nameless, New London, Conn.

NAMELESS: It could be that your friend can't avoid associating you with your brother, now that she's found her true love, or thinks she has. If this is the case, she's being totally unfair. You were an excellent friend to her, and I don't blame you for feeling upset.

Nevertheless, two wrongs don't make a right. So congratulate her on her engagement and be pleasant around her. The friendship you had may just be in hiding right now, and soon will be found.

Good friendships should last a lifetime, and many often do.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com