DR. WALLACE: I'm a sophomore at a large high school in Philadelphia. The school sponsors event dances on a Friday or Saturday evening from 7:00 p.m. to 10:00 p.m. and they are well attended. Only students who attend our school can attend these dances and they must show their student identification cards for entrance. Teachers and administrators act as chaperones. Two police officers patrol the parking lot to insure that cars are safe and they stay nearby in case they are needed in the dance.

My best friend has attended all four of the dances so far and told me they are a lot of fun and she has made several new friends. My mom won't let me attend the dances unless she can also be a chaperone. She talked to our principal and was told in a nice way, "Thanks, but no thanks." This means that I won't be allowed to attend any school dances this year.

I understand that you are a former high school principal. Were parents permitted to be dance chaperones at your high school? If the answer is No, please explain why. — Madison, Brooklyn, N.Y.

MADISON: Our school district ruled that all chaperones at school dances must be state-credentialed teachers, counselors and administrators. This is because they have the authority to deal with problems that might arise. It would not be wise to place parents in this role.

But parents were welcome to stop by for a short visit as guests. The maximum length of the visits was 15 minutes. This parent-dance program was well-received by parents and students. Most parents stopped by for a minute or two just to say hello and the students enjoyed seeing them come and enjoyed seeing them leave.

TEENS ARE SENTIMENTAL

DR. WALLACE: I hope you can help me decide what to do. I was married for five years to a man with a beautiful little girl. I think she and I had a good relationship (we were more like friends than mother and daughter). But we lost contact after the divorce.

While culling out my scrapbook, I found some of the souvenirs I had saved from her childhood. I bought a little silver box to put them in and I'd like to mail them to her on her 18th birthday, but I don't know if I should. I don't want to get back in between her parents and their new spouses. I'm happily married myself and have a nice uncomplicated life. But I would like for her to have this as I think it would mean a lot to her as an adult.

Should I keep to myself, or should I send her the present on her birthday? My concern is her happiness. Please help. — Undecided, Moline, Ill.

UNDECIDED: Teenagers are very sentimental. Send her the souvenirs. She will be very happy to receive them.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.