DR. WALLACE: Growing up, I spent a lot of time with my paternal grandfather. I remember going fishing with him and also to some sporting events and even the movies when I was a kid. I loved the thrill of being thought of as old enough to go to see a movie in a theater. This grandpa is still with us, but he's not in the best of health and his mind has faded quite a bit over the years. I remember many years ago when I was younger and I was facing some particular decision at that time; he mentioned something to me about how important it is to evaluate "side by side" all the choices that I had in front of me.

I don't remember exactly what the decision was I was making way back then or how exactly I came to my conclusion, but I do specifically remember that phrase my grandfather told me and how serious he was about it. I realize that you don't know him and have never met him, but I'm wondering if you could give me your best guess at what you think he may have been referring to or thinking about at that time he gave me his advice. — My Grandfather is Awesome, via email

MY GRANDFATHER IS AWESOME: It's wonderful that you and your grandfather shared some great times together when you were both younger and that you bonded so well.

His use of the phrase 'side-by-side' makes me think that he was referring to you literally doing your best to break down the positive and negative impacts and considerations of each decision you had in front of you. A typical way of doing this over the years has been to construct two columns in a side-by-side manner with all of the positives on one side and the negatives on the other. Or, to list the implications of how to handle two situations differently in terms of their impact on your life in different ways, as in that case there would be different considerations which may transcend just simple positives and negatives.

Basically, he was advising you to write out two opposing columns to study, as that method has paid off for many people over the decades facing all kinds of serious situations in front of them.

REFRAME HOW YOU LOOK AT THIS TIME OF YOUR LIFE

DR. WALLACE: I'm a sophomore in high school and what you would call an average student. My grades are usually Cs with an occasional B once in a while. I know it's early already in the school year, but my mind tends to wander in terms of how much longer this school year is going to be, plus I know I have two more years of high school in front of me still.

Because I'm always worried about how long I'm going to be in stuck in school before I can go out and get a job, I feel anxious and sometimes it's hard for me to concentrate in class. What I really want is to get a job as a tradesman like my older brother. He's 22 and makes a really great living and he's told me several times he'll gladly introduce me to the management at his job as they have programs I could enter immediately after high school. — The School Years Are Too Long, via email

THE SCHOOL YEARS ARE TOO LONG: It's great that you have an idea for what you would like to do upon your graduation, but you have more than two and a half years of high school still in front of you. Therefore, my advice is not to think about how long your sophomore year will take or how long it will be until you graduate as a senior, but to break things down into segments now.

Create a handwritten chart or use a cell phone if you have one to focus only on the current month and the next month in front of you. For example, list the days and weeks of October and November only at this point. Come up with a list of things you need to do, especially regarding your schoolwork, during this period of time.

To balance things out, also spend some time studying the various trade fields you consider may be appropriate for you in the future. Do some reading, talk to various people and truly get yourself mentally prepared for where you will be in a few short years. To me, the key is to not look at the time in front of you as a liability, but rather as an asset. You can use this time to better manage your study and performance skills in school, as that will save you time over the rest of this school year and the next two.

You can use the extra time to prepare yourself for your career and to do some fun activities that you would like to do as a reward for yourself. Also, you may want to check with your parents to see if it would be appropriate for you to get a part-time job just a few hours a week to start with, perhaps on weekends.

This will not only help you to pass the time, but will give you some extra discretionary spending money beyond any allowance you may be presently receiving. Life will get very fast for you once you graduate from high school. You have the opportunity to truly enjoy the time you have now until your high school graduation. Reframing your mindset from this perspective will pay off handsomely in many ways going forward. Give it a lot of thought, craft your own path forward, but definitely realize things are much better for you than you currently realize.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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