DR. WALLACE: I'm a parent of three teens. I'm often discussing their upbringing with other parents and friends of the family as well. Virtually all other parents feel the same way I do, so we have some very interesting and in-depth discussions about many topics relating to our teens.

One of the topics we spent the most time on was alcohol and alcohol abuse. As parents, we discussed where teens get their alcohol. Sometimes they can get others to purchase it at stores for them, but in our discussions we found that some of the friends of our teens are actually given alcohol by their own parents!

Why are these parents not able to understand that this is absolutely not a good idea? — Concerned Parents, via email

CONCERNED PARENTS: Your research is indeed valid, as I've heard many times over the years that some parents feel it's better for their kids to drink at home under their supervision. Other times, aunts, uncles, grandparents, stepparents or even family friends will provide alcohol to underage minors.

Any adult who provides alcohol to any minor is making a grave error, in my opinion. I've seen far too many letters about terrible consequences including fatal automobile accidents that involved teenagers, alcohol and often innocent other motorists.

THIS GUY IS NOT GOOD FOR MY MOM

DR. WALLACE: How can I convince my mother to see that her current boyfriend is not reliable or worthy of hanging out with her?

I am a senior in high school and an only child, and I play varsity basketball on our high school girls' basketball team.

I'm planning next year to attend a local college within driving distance, so I'd like to live at home with my mom if it would be possible and comfortable to do so next year.

But if the same lousy boyfriend is going to be hanging around, I feel that I'll have no choice but to try to get an apartment together with one of my girlfriends.

This boyfriend that my mom has literally lives off of her income and he always seems drunk or about to become sloppy drunk. He gets some check from the state once a month, but it's not a lot of money, and from what I can see he spends virtually all of it on alcohol.

How can I get my mom to see the light in this situation? — Not Happy with This Guy, via email

NOT HAPPY WITH THIS GUY: It appears your mother fits into the classic saying that "love is blind" and for whatever reason she appears to be willing for now to continue to enable him.

I suggest you take your mother out to lunch on a Saturday afternoon away from this man so that you can tell her you were worried enough about this situation to write in to an advice column.

Let her know how much you love her and that you are always concerned about her well-being, safety and security. You did not mention whether or not this man ever gets behind the wheel of an automobile, but based upon your story it would be a terrible idea for him to be driving at virtually any time of day. Make sure you bring all of this up with her and tell her just how concerned you are but that you also understand she can choose her own friends and romantic partners.

Finally, be blunt with your mother and let her know that if this man is still around when you graduate high school and turn 18, then you're planning to move out on your own, even though you would love to continue living with her. Give her a big hug at the end of this discussion and let her know that you are not mad at her but rather you're just simply concerned and want the best for her at all times.

As you were growing up, she no doubt knew exactly how it felt to her to look out for a loved one and be concerned about their safety and well-being. Hopefully, this may help provide an angle to get your message through quite clearly to her.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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